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I know of a couple socially awkward men who did the following: 1. Cut a hole in a box. Actually, no. Wrong concept. That's not it. Let's try again. 1
by michaelochurch 14y ago
I know of a couple socially awkward men who did the following:
1. Cut a hole in a box.
Actually, no. Wrong concept. That's not it. Let's try again.
1. Go to Central Park on a summer afternoon.
2. Ask 100 random strangers out on a date. No fancy approaches or bullshit
pick-up lines. Just start a conversation, and ask before a minute's
up. Oh, don't ask for a phone number (you might get a fake, or
non-returned calls, and that's worse than a flat-out rejection).
Ask for an actual date.
3. Your median outcome will be zero; some people get lucky
and get 1 or 2, but don't count on it ...
4. ... but you've now been rejected 98-100 times and you're still alive.
Learning to sell ideas is a similar process. You're going to fail a lot, especially if your ideas are any good (because they threaten established power-holders). Just keep going. You'll fear rejection less as time goes on.
- digitalengineer 14y agoHere's an idea: Read this free ebook: The Flinch The idea is simple: your flinch mechanism can save your life. It shortcircuits the conscious mind and allows you to pull back and avoid danger faster than you can even imagine it’s there. But what if danger is exactly what you need? What if facing the flinch is the one best way to get what you want? What are you afraid of? Here's how to find out. http://www.amazon.com/The-Flinch-ebook/dp/B0062Q7S3S http://www.amazon.com/The-Flinch-ebook/dp/B0062Q7S3S
- cperciva 14y agoI don't like this, since it imposes externalities -- in the form of wasted time and an uncomfortable end to the conversation -- on the hundred random strangers you pick.
- SatvikBeri 14y agoYou're typically introducing a positive, not a negative. Most people enjoy a quick chat and find being asked out flattering even if they're not interested.
- cperciva 14y agofind being asked out flattering even if they're not interested Maybe if it's a rare occurrence, but I think it would get irritating before long if a lot of people took the advice of asking out random strangers. It also imposes an externality on any other potential ask-outers, in that it makes them less likely to be taken seriously.
- vinceguidry 14y ago> Maybe if it's a rare occurrence, but I think it would get irritating before long if a lot of people took the advice of asking out random strangers. When you pick an obscure tactic, the whole point is to trade on the fact that others aren't doing so. If by chance that particular tactic does get popular, you simply pivot and pick another obscure tactic, or move to a field where there are fewer players.
- 31reasons 14y agoOur brain is good at making excuses for things that make us uncomfortable. Instead of 100, go ask at least 5 and see how it feels.