Hmm. I've been in your position. I tried to eat better, continue working on things I cared about, be nice to people, and exercise. It didn't actually change muc

Hmm. I've been in your position. I tried to eat better, continue working on things I cared about, be nice to people, and exercise. It didn't actually change much for me. However, when I started taking anti-depressant medications things did change. I am still trying to live a socially and physically healthy life, but I'm noticing changes that weren't happening before taking the medication. Physical differences like food tasting better, feeling warmth instead of nothing, increased sex drive and similar things. Your local city might have programs set up where you can go and get free help. It is something worth looking into if you have the energy. Right now, even though my situation is very similar to where I was before, choosing to live is a lot easier. I actually acknowledge all the good things a lot more then I used to and its much easier for me to be happy about the improvements I see rather then focused on my failures. The really cool thing is that without suicide hanging over my head I'm a lot more able to actually do things. When people ask me out to eat I say yes. I've went on trips too. Basically, there are a lot of fun and good things that you will be able to do once you've dealt with this. Good luck and hopefully you find my anecdote helpful.