4 ms·

I didn't find it strange; the fact that you do is surprising, and therefore potentially interesting. Would you care to elaborate?

by pjscott 14y ago

jes5199 14y ago
It covers a lot of subject matter, and all of it seems to be from ways of interacting with the world that are alien to me. Public complaining about your ex? Pick up artistry? Inteviewing cliques of women in bars? Bizzare charactures of the idea of romance? Weird superiority/inferiority posturing? Trying to reduce a first impression to one-liners? It feels more like cable television than real life.
- mnicole 14y ago
  The one-liners thing really put me off too. I couldn't tell if they were being sarcastic. Works 10% of the time because 10% have a bar low enough for empty flattery? A friend of mine dated one of the more prolific figures in that realm (don't know his name, it was just a big deal among the group) and she said he was ultimately just making money off of his Narcissistic Personality Disorder and she never wanted to see the guy again. I think a lot of people on dating sites are going about it the wrong way and making themselves feel worse in the process when they don't have to. Find a forum or a chatroom about topics that interest you or that you want to know more about (for your benefit, in communities where the gender of your choosing makes up to 30-70% of the userbase). Get invested in the topic, meet people, learn some stuff and see if any connections arise. You meet people in the real world in situations that you have in common, and that's how finding relationships online should be too. Some people may want the instant-gratification of going out to a bar to meet this person or maybe they're just gunning for a one-night-stand, which is fine too. But if my friends are anything to base things off of, distance is no longer an issue for people looking for serious, long-term relationships. I've seen lots of people fly over oceans to be together, many end up staying that way.
- illuminate 14y ago
  Yeah, the PUA discussion and "ha ha only serious" sour grapes are definite distractions.

I didn't find it strange; the fact that you do is surprising, and therefore potentially interesting. Would you care to elaborate?

by pjscott 14y ago

I didn't find it strange; the fact that you do is surprising, and therefore potentially interesting. Would you care to elaborate?

jes5199 14y ago

It covers a lot of subject matter, and all of it seems to be from ways of interacting with the world that are alien to me. Public complaining about your ex? Pick up artistry? Inteviewing cliques of women in bars? Bizzare charactures of the idea of romance? Weird superiority/inferiority posturing? Trying to reduce a first impression to one-liners? It feels more like cable television than real life.

mnicole 14y ago
The one-liners thing really put me off too. I couldn't tell if they were being sarcastic. Works 10% of the time because 10% have a bar low enough for empty flattery? A friend of mine dated one of the more prolific figures in that realm (don't know his name, it was just a big deal among the group) and she said he was ultimately just making money off of his Narcissistic Personality Disorder and she never wanted to see the guy again. I think a lot of people on dating sites are going about it the wrong way and making themselves feel worse in the process when they don't have to. Find a forum or a chatroom about topics that interest you or that you want to know more about (for your benefit, in communities where the gender of your choosing makes up to 30-70% of the userbase). Get invested in the topic, meet people, learn some stuff and see if any connections arise. You meet people in the real world in situations that you have in common, and that's how finding relationships online should be too. Some people may want the instant-gratification of going out to a bar to meet this person or maybe they're just gunning for a one-night-stand, which is fine too. But if my friends are anything to base things off of, distance is no longer an issue for people looking for serious, long-term relationships. I've seen lots of people fly over oceans to be together, many end up staying that way.
illuminate 14y ago
Yeah, the PUA discussion and "ha ha only serious" sour grapes are definite distractions.