3 ms·

A useful exercise may be to examine why you thought I was mocking you, even though nothing like that appears in the piece. Similarly, your defensiveness in thin

A useful exercise may be to examine why you thought I was mocking you, even though nothing like that appears in the piece. Similarly, your defensiveness in thinking I asked for, or wanted, some kind of apology isn't supported anywhere in the article. Really think about where those responses come from, because I think that could be one of the best lessons you take away from the article, since your heart is in the right place on the issues I was trying to raise. I suspect part if what impacted your perceptions here is that this article was not solely, or even primarily, directed at you. Thanks for reading!

mindcrime 14y ago
I am, of course, over-generalizing. I don't see it as mocking me specifically... but honestly, this piece read very similarly to a class of articles / commentaries / whatever, that one commonly sees in the wild, that seem obsessed with asking white, male Americans (and related groups) to engage in pure self-deprecation, attribute everything good in their lives to "privilege" or luck, and feel no pride in their accomplishments. Maybe it hits close to home for me, because while I was born in the US, as a male, in a marginally stable family (my parents didn't divorce until I was 16), I feel like I've overcome a tremendous amount of adversity nonetheless, and when people - who I expect are largely more prosperous, more affluent, etc. than I am - come out and start talking like I should be apologetic for my circumstances, I chafe at that a bit. White? Yeah... "white trash". America? Yeah... North Carolina: rural North Carolina... very rural North Carolina. Family? Yeah... my dad dropped out of school in 8th grade, never really learned to read, worked back-breaking manual labor jobs his whole life, the majority of which kept him away from home for months at a time. I barely knew my dad as a kid, and we went through more than one period of being on food-stamps/welfare/etc. while he as between jobs... my mom had some mental health issues and threatened to kill herself not infrequently, and may have tried once. Etc., etc., etc. Now, no matter how hard my childhood was, I know there are people who have it worse, even much worse, especially in 3rd world countries. And I am sympathetic and I do want to help make the world - as a whole - a better place, for them as well. But damnit, any insinuation that I had some sort of easy path to success by virtue of being white, male and American just rubs me the wrong way. Like I said... "we all have our own cross to bear". Oh, and I tend to take things too personally sometimes. :-)

mindcrime 14y ago

I am, of course, over-generalizing. I don't see it as mocking me specifically... but honestly, this piece read very similarly to a class of articles / commentaries / whatever, that one commonly sees in the wild, that seem obsessed with asking white, male Americans (and related groups) to engage in pure self-deprecation, attribute everything good in their lives to "privilege" or luck, and feel no pride in their accomplishments. Maybe it hits close to home for me, because while I was born in the US, as a male, in a marginally stable family (my parents didn't divorce until I was 16), I feel like I've overcome a tremendous amount of adversity nonetheless, and when people - who I expect are largely more prosperous, more affluent, etc. than I am - come out and start talking like I should be apologetic for my circumstances, I chafe at that a bit. White? Yeah... "white trash". America? Yeah... North Carolina: rural North Carolina... very rural North Carolina. Family? Yeah... my dad dropped out of school in 8th grade, never really learned to read, worked back-breaking manual labor jobs his whole life, the majority of which kept him away from home for months at a time. I barely knew my dad as a kid, and we went through more than one period of being on food-stamps/welfare/etc. while he as between jobs... my mom had some mental health issues and threatened to kill herself not infrequently, and may have tried once. Etc., etc., etc. Now, no matter how hard my childhood was, I know there are people who have it worse, even much worse, especially in 3rd world countries. And I am sympathetic and I do want to help make the world - as a whole - a better place, for them as well. But damnit, any insinuation that I had some sort of easy path to success by virtue of being white, male and American just rubs me the wrong way. Like I said... "we all have our own cross to bear". Oh, and I tend to take things too personally sometimes. :-)