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This kind of response terrifies me. I'm a man, so maybe I am not in a place to correct you, but I have gotten the impression that the pressure and discomfort wr

This kind of response terrifies me. I'm a man, so maybe I am not in a place to correct you, but I have gotten the impression that the pressure and discomfort wrought by this kind of behavior (whether or not you have a thick enough skin to deal with it) pushes a lot of women away from tech in the first place. Even if you try and reduce the behavior to "little boys club" material, such joking is still alienating to many women. Not only are you reducing her importance based on her former title/role at SendGrid, but you're saying her behavior warranted ("opened herself to") harassment. No two men or women are the same, but your not sympathizing with her at all confounds me. EDIT: fixed a typo

overgryphon 14y ago
Juvenile behavior alienates people, not women. Just because a woman was offended doesn't make it a gender issue. Richards can say what she is offended by, but she doesn't get to speak for women. And if she's going to consider herself qualified to speak for "women in tech", then she'd better at least be a part of that group. There are real legitimate problems with gender disparity in the software development community. People like Richards undermine those wanting to discuss real problems by calling attention to situations that don't deserve it. The question I've most heard from women considering an undergraduate degree in computer science is whether women are treated as horribly as comments like the one I was responding to describe- "the abundant reality of insults, abuse, threats, hatred, contempt, ridicule, disdain, disregard that women in tech routinely face". And that simply isn't true. Yes, there are gender problems in a community that is largely male oriented, but there is no need to exaggerate them to such lengths. I am just so tired of "women in tech" groups telling me how discriminated I am. Let me evaluate that for myself, thank you very much. Not to mention that it is completely unacceptable to post pictures of other people online without their permission. Had those two men been women, would we be having a discussion of the danger of stalking, death threats, and abuse that Richards put them in? And please excuse me, I wasn't trying to say her behavior warranted harassment- simply that by making the situation public, she took that risk. She could have easily handled this situation in a more discrete manner.
- andrewdupont 14y ago
  > Had those two men been women, would we be having a discussion of the danger of stalking, death threats, and abuse that Richards put them in? Yes.

overgryphon 14y ago

Juvenile behavior alienates people, not women. Just because a woman was offended doesn't make it a gender issue. Richards can say what she is offended by, but she doesn't get to speak for women. And if she's going to consider herself qualified to speak for "women in tech", then she'd better at least be a part of that group. There are real legitimate problems with gender disparity in the software development community. People like Richards undermine those wanting to discuss real problems by calling attention to situations that don't deserve it. The question I've most heard from women considering an undergraduate degree in computer science is whether women are treated as horribly as comments like the one I was responding to describe- "the abundant reality of insults, abuse, threats, hatred, contempt, ridicule, disdain, disregard that women in tech routinely face". And that simply isn't true. Yes, there are gender problems in a community that is largely male oriented, but there is no need to exaggerate them to such lengths. I am just so tired of "women in tech" groups telling me how discriminated I am. Let me evaluate that for myself, thank you very much. Not to mention that it is completely unacceptable to post pictures of other people online without their permission. Had those two men been women, would we be having a discussion of the danger of stalking, death threats, and abuse that Richards put them in? And please excuse me, I wasn't trying to say her behavior warranted harassment- simply that by making the situation public, she took that risk. She could have easily handled this situation in a more discrete manner.

andrewdupont 14y ago
> Had those two men been women, would we be having a discussion of the danger of stalking, death threats, and abuse that Richards put them in? Yes.