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I find we're really bad at defining goals. Let's play a short question game. You win if you read through these questions and you say "Nah, got this covered" wit

I find we're really bad at defining goals. Let's play a short question game. You win if you read through these questions and you say "Nah, got this covered" without feeling guilty. What are you working for? To better society? To make an impact? Sure. That's a little vague though, isn't it? Ok, maybe it's to better society. Define better (Well, uhmm...better, you know?") and define society (Uhmm...the country? Ohh wait, the world? Maybe those kids in africa?). You kinda see where I'm going with "this is way vague for a life purpose"? Ok, let's take the impact example. Which impact? Do you want to be remembered? Just remembered, or positively remembered? Or do you want to make a lasting change on the face of earth? How long should it last? How visible should it be? Or do you want to change somebody? How do you want to change them? What will you do to change them? The gist is definition. A lot of "career planning" is an improperly defined goal for an even larger time period than the usual resolutions we make. Stop smoking, lose weight, work out more. How often do you keep your new years resolutions? Proably not that often. So why are you entrusting your life purpose to the same kind of expectation making that you do for your new years resolution, to some goal with quicksand consistency? You know the feeling you get in mid february that you didn't keep up with your resolutions, right? You feel guilty because you've wasted another year and still haven't gotten these things done. Lack of willpower, right? Ok, imagine you're 35, look at your life resolution, realize that you haven't lost weight nor changed the world, and you feel guilty. Really guilty. Because your former me is ashamed of what you've done. And it's not just a new years resolution, it's your life goal you haven't gotten done. Ok, fair enough. Figure out what exactly you are trying to do till when, preferably with why you want to do these things. Name - date - reason. You can't worry about the pointlessness of something if you got the point on a paper in front of you, 12pt Times New Roman. Then factor that into object(ive)s and method(ology)s, so you can whip up the source of your life one task after another. You'll get there.

Retric 14y ago
The real problem is forget what actually makes them happy can have little to do with what society says should make them happy. I feel more joy thinking about my job as useful destructive chaos than any sort of direct betterment to society. Consider, people actually making atomic bombs often had a great deal of job satisfaction. You can look at people at the bottom as in desperate need of help, or a buffer in case of crop failure. Now think about it for a second which idea makes you feel better? PS: I am not saying this is a good thing, but it's a thing that's worth considering.
- solistice 14y ago
  So when society tells you what you should feel, you obey? Society is an overly broad term. You assume it's a rather large set of people, but it might just be your aquaintances and some talking heads. I think any ill defined concepts in your moral understanding are like security holes, allowing for inconsistencys to slip in. And society somehow comes to mean a different thing in each case. It's a prime example of an inconsistent concept. Along with "the public", "the greater good", etc. You get my bend. I think we're getting into value systems right now. Feeling better. Happiness, right? Exitement. Tranquility. Lack of Guilt. Joy. From AI i've learned that actors work optimally when they optimize a key metric. That metric has to be defined properly (So what makes this robot morose?), and there has to be a heuristic for estimating the changes to that metric given an action. I think we work very similarily. Your value system, whether you value joy, prestige or altruism is the optimization metric. Your emotional apparatus (it matches input to output) is the quick, over the thumb heuristic you use. I for example am optimizing for Happiness. Creating things makes me happy. Solving tacky problems makes me happy. Helping other people makes me happy (If they choose to let me help them, and if they are thankful towards me afterwards). Learning useful things makes me happy. It's quite likely that some of these things will benefit others greatly, but that's a side effect, not the moral justification of my actions. I honestly don't feel bad about that kind of motivation, because it makes sense.
willismichael 14y ago
> Ok, imagine you're 35 Did I read that right? Are you really using 35 as an arbitrary number meaning "some distant point in the future"?
- eli_gottlieb 14y ago
  More like 35 as that point when you realize you're not young anymore, this is actually your real life, and you need to stop daydreaming and deal with it.
  - RougeFemme 14y ago
    Although there's nothing wrong with constantly wondering what you want to be when you grow up. . .even when you're "old" - however you define that. . .as long as it doesn't lead to unhappiness or obsessive navel-gazing.
    - krapp 14y ago
      As someone who's experienced both depression and obsessive navel-gazing at 35 I can attest to its counterproductive nature.
- solistice 14y ago
  I'm using 35 as the midpoint to 70, the rough point at which, if you're doing the wrong thing, you can't kid yourself anymore. For some people it's 25, for some 40, for some it never ever happens and they just live out their lives. The number IS arabitary +-10 years, but you won't have your midlife crisis when you're 5, nor when you're 90.

Retric 14y ago

The real problem is forget what actually makes them happy can have little to do with what society says should make them happy. I feel more joy thinking about my job as useful destructive chaos than any sort of direct betterment to society. Consider, people actually making atomic bombs often had a great deal of job satisfaction. You can look at people at the bottom as in desperate need of help, or a buffer in case of crop failure. Now think about it for a second which idea makes you feel better? PS: I am not saying this is a good thing, but it's a thing that's worth considering.

solistice 14y ago
So when society tells you what you should feel, you obey? Society is an overly broad term. You assume it's a rather large set of people, but it might just be your aquaintances and some talking heads. I think any ill defined concepts in your moral understanding are like security holes, allowing for inconsistencys to slip in. And society somehow comes to mean a different thing in each case. It's a prime example of an inconsistent concept. Along with "the public", "the greater good", etc. You get my bend. I think we're getting into value systems right now. Feeling better. Happiness, right? Exitement. Tranquility. Lack of Guilt. Joy. From AI i've learned that actors work optimally when they optimize a key metric. That metric has to be defined properly (So what makes this robot morose?), and there has to be a heuristic for estimating the changes to that metric given an action. I think we work very similarily. Your value system, whether you value joy, prestige or altruism is the optimization metric. Your emotional apparatus (it matches input to output) is the quick, over the thumb heuristic you use. I for example am optimizing for Happiness. Creating things makes me happy. Solving tacky problems makes me happy. Helping other people makes me happy (If they choose to let me help them, and if they are thankful towards me afterwards). Learning useful things makes me happy. It's quite likely that some of these things will benefit others greatly, but that's a side effect, not the moral justification of my actions. I honestly don't feel bad about that kind of motivation, because it makes sense.

willismichael 14y ago

> Ok, imagine you're 35 Did I read that right? Are you really using 35 as an arbitrary number meaning "some distant point in the future"?

eli_gottlieb 14y ago
More like 35 as that point when you realize you're not young anymore, this is actually your real life, and you need to stop daydreaming and deal with it.
- RougeFemme 14y ago
  Although there's nothing wrong with constantly wondering what you want to be when you grow up. . .even when you're "old" - however you define that. . .as long as it doesn't lead to unhappiness or obsessive navel-gazing.
  - krapp 14y ago
    As someone who's experienced both depression and obsessive navel-gazing at 35 I can attest to its counterproductive nature.
solistice 14y ago
I'm using 35 as the midpoint to 70, the rough point at which, if you're doing the wrong thing, you can't kid yourself anymore. For some people it's 25, for some 40, for some it never ever happens and they just live out their lives. The number IS arabitary +-10 years, but you won't have your midlife crisis when you're 5, nor when you're 90.