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My jaded and unfortunate observation is that most women tend to focus on "number" in the other direction. If your number's lower than theirs, even if that's lar

My jaded and unfortunate observation is that most women tend to focus on "number" in the other direction. If your number's lower than theirs, even if that's largely by choice, they don't respect you because you're not "alpha" enough to be worthy of their time. At least, this is what I've observed in the American dating scene; the rest of the world is utterly different. The big problem is that American women are prone to "groupthink", and judge a man's desirability based on how attractive they presume other women to find him. So a guy with a low number is perceived as unwanted for that reason alone. Women in the rest of the world are a lot more independent-minded and don't fall to this. I take it the other way. I've decided that if the majority of women in NYC aren't going to respect me because my number is (voluntarily) low-- not zero, but single-digits-- I shouldn't feel bad about being an unforgiving bastard when it comes to women being too experienced/"stretched out". Regardless of age, I don't think I could marry a woman whose number's higher than 5.

shard 18y ago
I disagree. I've found that if you rock their world, women (and men) will overlook many problems. So instead of trying for a higher score than her, which doesn't improve her life any, just be the most fun, interesting, exciting guy she's ever met, and not worry about the other stuff.
Matti 18y ago
Go look at yourself in the mirror. Do you see a number stamped on your forehead? Unless an individual has been monitored 24/7 since (s)he hit puberty, there's no way of knowing how many persons that individual has slept with. Women aren't interested in numbers per se, they're interested in meeting confident and socially savvy men. If you're a guy who's social, cool and fun to hang around with, people will tend to assume that you've slept with more than a few women. If you on the other hand come off as a bitter and angry person, most people will think that your "number" is low or non-existant, because you're displaying some very unattractive traits.
- yummyfajitas 18y ago
  Usually, over the course of a relationship, you get a rough picture of what the number is. There is a certain type of woman who will look down on you if you have a lower number, namely the status-seeking type of girl. Avoiding this type is probably a good idea regardless of whether your number is bigger or smaller.
michaelkeenan 18y ago
The big problem is that American women are prone to "groupthink", and judge a man's desirability based on how attractive they presume other women to find him...Women in the rest of the world are a lot more independent-minded and don't fall to this. No, I think that might be human nature.
- time_management 18y ago
  Women's tastes in men, in most of the world, are a lot more refined than they are in the US. Women overseas tend to make their own decisions about whom they consider attractive, rather than conferring with their friends. I have traveled enough to have observed this distinction, and it's striking. The cultures are very different. In most of the world, nerds are not unpopular; nerds are cool.

shard 18y ago

I disagree. I've found that if you rock their world, women (and men) will overlook many problems. So instead of trying for a higher score than her, which doesn't improve her life any, just be the most fun, interesting, exciting guy she's ever met, and not worry about the other stuff.

Matti 18y ago

Go look at yourself in the mirror. Do you see a number stamped on your forehead? Unless an individual has been monitored 24/7 since (s)he hit puberty, there's no way of knowing how many persons that individual has slept with. Women aren't interested in numbers per se, they're interested in meeting confident and socially savvy men. If you're a guy who's social, cool and fun to hang around with, people will tend to assume that you've slept with more than a few women. If you on the other hand come off as a bitter and angry person, most people will think that your "number" is low or non-existant, because you're displaying some very unattractive traits.

yummyfajitas 18y ago
Usually, over the course of a relationship, you get a rough picture of what the number is. There is a certain type of woman who will look down on you if you have a lower number, namely the status-seeking type of girl. Avoiding this type is probably a good idea regardless of whether your number is bigger or smaller.

michaelkeenan 18y ago

The big problem is that American women are prone to "groupthink", and judge a man's desirability based on how attractive they presume other women to find him...Women in the rest of the world are a lot more independent-minded and don't fall to this. No, I think that might be human nature.

time_management 18y ago
Women's tastes in men, in most of the world, are a lot more refined than they are in the US. Women overseas tend to make their own decisions about whom they consider attractive, rather than conferring with their friends. I have traveled enough to have observed this distinction, and it's striking. The cultures are very different. In most of the world, nerds are not unpopular; nerds are cool.