There are two different mechanisms being pointed out, and it's important to understand the distinction. The first is the tendency for your burn rate to drift u

There are two different mechanisms being pointed out, and it's important to understand the distinction. The first is the tendency for your burn rate to drift up to match your neighbors. Even when encouraged by your neighbors being assholes about it, that is a matter of discipline; if your discipline is in the top ninety-whatever percentile, it is possible to stop yourself doing this. The second is the fact that some companies attach to some jobs very high unpaid expenses that they dishonestly don't point out until after your working for the company, e.g. refusing to give you a high-paid job unless you drive to work in an expensive car. There's nothing to be done about that in the first sense; if they won't give you the job unless you spend much of your salary on these unpaid expenses, then they won't. What you need to do in this case is recognize such jobs, subtract the unpaid expenses from your after-tax salary, and make your decision whether to accept the job or walk away, based on your take-home pay after expenses, not before.