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For glob's sake, I wish people would stop saying "I'm not sexist BUT..." or "I'm not racist BUT..." or "I'm not a homophobe BUT..." Because: A) You're setting

For glob's sake, I wish people would stop saying "I'm not sexist BUT..." or "I'm not racist BUT..." or "I'm not a homophobe BUT..." Because: A) You're setting yourself up for failure. B) Show, don't tell. but most importantly C) it's hardly ever useful to denote any one person as racist or sexist or whatever. It's thoughts and ideas and biases which are much more usefully labeled so. So, great, you are not sexist: you do not willfully do women ill. But do your ideas and unconscious actions support that intention? I would start by reflecting on the need to say "key word: equal", as though there are some politically significant number of people wishing for something beyond that.

gavanwoolery 14y ago
No buts, I just wanted to make it apparent from the start that I am not sexist. "Equality" is all that I want, and it bugs me when people start saying things like "the industry is filled with sexism" or "sexism is the norm" or "most males are sexist" because it is simply not true. Or it is true, and 99.999 women just choose to be silent about their cases of sexism. It is insulting when people attack males as a single group based on some edge cases.
- nollidge 14y ago
  > Or it is true, and 99.999 women just choose to be silent about their cases of sexism. They are far more silent that you think. Ask some actual women about it some time. > It is insulting when people attack males as a single group based on some edge cases. You're right, that would be insulting, if it were at all what was actually happening in this plane of reality.
- dangerf 14y ago
  Of course it's true that sexism exists - plenty of women do choose to be silent on issues of sexism. It is an incredibly hard to bring up such a personal thing when you want to be taken seriously professionally.
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- fatbird 14y ago
  It is insulting when people attack males as a single group based on some edge cases. Men are so sensitive about sexist comments when they perceive they're the targets. Lighten up, dude, I'm not sexist :)

gavanwoolery 14y ago

No buts, I just wanted to make it apparent from the start that I am not sexist. "Equality" is all that I want, and it bugs me when people start saying things like "the industry is filled with sexism" or "sexism is the norm" or "most males are sexist" because it is simply not true. Or it is true, and 99.999 women just choose to be silent about their cases of sexism. It is insulting when people attack males as a single group based on some edge cases.

nollidge 14y ago
> Or it is true, and 99.999 women just choose to be silent about their cases of sexism. They are far more silent that you think. Ask some actual women about it some time. > It is insulting when people attack males as a single group based on some edge cases. You're right, that would be insulting, if it were at all what was actually happening in this plane of reality.
dangerf 14y ago
Of course it's true that sexism exists - plenty of women do choose to be silent on issues of sexism. It is an incredibly hard to bring up such a personal thing when you want to be taken seriously professionally.
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fatbird 14y ago
It is insulting when people attack males as a single group based on some edge cases. Men are so sensitive about sexist comments when they perceive they're the targets. Lighten up, dude, I'm not sexist :)