Sounds to me like undiagnosed depression. Treatment helps, and I do mean antidepressants. Fooled by Randomness also helps. Volunteerism helps. Doing things help

Sounds to me like undiagnosed depression. Treatment helps, and I do mean antidepressants. Fooled by Randomness also helps. Volunteerism helps. Doing things helps. Throw yourself in with the salt of the earth. Once you get your mood straightened out, you will find that day two of progress is worth more than years wasted on regret, but the mood disorder is not something you should expect to succeed at thinking your way through.