3 ms·

An unmarried woman with a child isn't necessarily carrying "massive baggage." What a rude and borderline misogynistic sentiment.

cgio 14y ago
It is misogynistic, and it makes me think, maybe online dating works and that is why his experiences are negative!
- wlesieutre 14y ago
  I don't see how it's misogynistic. A woman on a dating site who didn't want to settle down and raise a family would probably have the exact same reaction to a single father's profile. Maybe there's a more polite way of phrasing it, but if you don't want to be raising a kid, then seeing one as "extra baggage" doesn't seem like a stretch to me. Edit: As sfall points out, he wrote "extra" and not "massive"
  - manicdee 14y ago
    Regardless of adjective, the choice to characterise children as baggage indicates the mindset of the writer. If you don't want to be involved in the responsibilities of raising children, make sure your filter has "no kids" set. If you can't set a filter because you are so desperate for any contact that you "cast your net wider", the problem is you. Feature, not baggage. Unwanted feature? Filter out the undesirable profiles.
sfall 14y ago
at least quote him right he said extra baggage. We all carry around these traits that define our lives, our jobs, family, hobbies, the list goes on and on. In this case when you date someone (man or woman) who has a child it creates boundaries on a potential relationship. An imperfect example would be the adult w/o a child likes to take last minute trips (it is something they do enough, and they are not willing to give it up at this time) maybe reluctant to date another adult who has a child because they would presumably not be able to partake in this cherished activity.
tomjen3 14y ago
In the dating world, yes she is. It is not fair, of course, but it is the truth. Just as short guys like me are at a disadvantage, so a women with children, people with disabilities, ugly people, people who live at home with their parents, people who are unemployed, old people (but this bias is mostly against women), people who are addicted to drugs, people who have STDs, etc. Again not fair, but the dating world is a market -- we all try to sell ourself for the best possible offer.
- manicdee 14y ago
  You have conflated "dating" with "picking up". Single parent status is not baggage, it's a perk!
67726e 14y ago
Raising a child is a rather huge responsibility. How is it not "massive baggage"? Oh, and how is it misogynistic? A single male with a child has the same responsibilities as a woman.

cgio 14y ago

It is misogynistic, and it makes me think, maybe online dating works and that is why his experiences are negative!

wlesieutre 14y ago
I don't see how it's misogynistic. A woman on a dating site who didn't want to settle down and raise a family would probably have the exact same reaction to a single father's profile. Maybe there's a more polite way of phrasing it, but if you don't want to be raising a kid, then seeing one as "extra baggage" doesn't seem like a stretch to me. Edit: As sfall points out, he wrote "extra" and not "massive"
- manicdee 14y ago
  Regardless of adjective, the choice to characterise children as baggage indicates the mindset of the writer. If you don't want to be involved in the responsibilities of raising children, make sure your filter has "no kids" set. If you can't set a filter because you are so desperate for any contact that you "cast your net wider", the problem is you. Feature, not baggage. Unwanted feature? Filter out the undesirable profiles.

sfall 14y ago

at least quote him right he said extra baggage. We all carry around these traits that define our lives, our jobs, family, hobbies, the list goes on and on. In this case when you date someone (man or woman) who has a child it creates boundaries on a potential relationship. An imperfect example would be the adult w/o a child likes to take last minute trips (it is something they do enough, and they are not willing to give it up at this time) maybe reluctant to date another adult who has a child because they would presumably not be able to partake in this cherished activity.

tomjen3 14y ago

In the dating world, yes she is. It is not fair, of course, but it is the truth. Just as short guys like me are at a disadvantage, so a women with children, people with disabilities, ugly people, people who live at home with their parents, people who are unemployed, old people (but this bias is mostly against women), people who are addicted to drugs, people who have STDs, etc. Again not fair, but the dating world is a market -- we all try to sell ourself for the best possible offer.

manicdee 14y ago
You have conflated "dating" with "picking up". Single parent status is not baggage, it's a perk!

67726e 14y ago

Raising a child is a rather huge responsibility. How is it not "massive baggage"? Oh, and how is it misogynistic? A single male with a child has the same responsibilities as a woman.