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My parents put each other first and were very clear about it. They knew their kids would move out and have their own life. And they would have only each other a
by mattvanhorn 14y ago
My parents put each other first and were very clear about it. They knew their kids would move out and have their own life. And they would have only each other at that point. So, while I'm sure my mom would have rationed food to the kids first, in any non-survival situation, she'd side with my dad over me.
- btilly 14y agoIn front of the kids, I will support anything my wife says over the kids. Period. That is necessary to avoid having kids try to play one parent against the other. (Any attempt to actually play us against each other ends badly for the kids.) When my kids are teenagers, perhaps my feelings will shift. But right now my kids come first in my emotional life. I would die for them. I have compromised work for them. It wasn't even a question. I support my wife, but not as unconditionally as I support my children. This does not mean that I do everything they want. This does not mean that I try to be their lives. I want them happy and healthy, and I do everything that I think is good for them. This is not the same as being their friends. Nor should it be.