I do agree with you about that. It sucks that you had parents who weren't there for you in the way you needed. I'm doing my damndest not to repeat the mistakes

I do agree with you about that. It sucks that you had parents who weren't there for you in the way you needed. I'm doing my damndest not to repeat the mistakes my own parents made, and we'll see in twenty years or so how that goes. But, that was part of my point above. My sister to this day feels like she never had the supportive and attentive relationship with our late mother that she needed. (For what it's worth, I agree with her.) In my imaginary reality, at least, if she'd been the only child at home for a few days a week, while I was at day-care and then school, maybe she'd have grown up feeling differently. I see good parenting and good institutions - that's schools, but also parks and pools and little leagues and libraries, and, hell, even good policing - as mutually supportive. It's unfair to expect one side of the individual / community matrix to make up for all of the shortcomings of the other, but each can strengthen the other side.