4 ms·

"Also, if I had had a "soccer mom" that told me I couldn't wear a this or that color of trousers when I was 13 (13!!), I would have called her names, too." Jus

by edanm 14y ago

"Also, if I had had a "soccer mom" that told me I couldn't wear a this or that color of trousers when I was 13 (13!!), I would have called her names, too." Just an fyi, many countries have different levels of school uniforms. When I studied in England, I was wearing a full school uniform - button shirt, tie, trouses, sweater, etc. This from the first day of school, basically. Here in Israel, some schools have a "school shirt" policy, some don't have anything.

jalada 14y ago
Adding to this. Many secondary (high) schools in England have a strict uniform policy. Dark blue trousers when black is the rule would get you sent home.
bambax 14y ago
I went to a boarding school in Ireland for a year, and they had a uniform -- but it was a uniform, not a "policy". There was one pair of trousers, one shirt and one pullover allowed, and they were provided by the school. This was fine with me; it was a very clear rule with only one interpretation possible, and it was completely external to my relation with my parents or in fact authority in general. You had to wear a uniform, you wore a uniform. I was quite rebellious but I never had a problem with that. My guess is the OP's kid resents arbitrary rules and the way they are enforced. At what point does "dark blue" cease to be dark? And why does this woman feel the need to enforce the school's rules? Why doesn't she let him see for himself what happens when you go to that school with a red pair of pants? Does she fear it will reflect poorly on her? I feel everything is about her, not him, and that's why he's so upset.
- HarryHirsch 14y ago
  > I feel everything is about her, not him, and that's why he's so upset. Indeed. It seems that the son has an exemption from the uniform policy ("They told me I could wear these" he insisted), the mother has this desire to make the child conform, and is insufficiently introspective to examine her own motivations ("my 13-year old son ... missed his bus because he was wearing the wrong color pants"). Hey, he missed the bus because you made him wear your favorite set of trousers.
  - evan_ 14y ago
    You think the kid who thought threatening his mom with a knife was acceptable wouldn't tell a petty lie?
    - HarryHirsch 14y ago
      It's possible. But look at this: "Several weeks into his new junior high school, Michael began exhibiting increasingly odd and threatening behaviors at school. We decided to transfer him to the district’s most restrictive behavioral program" Something changed with the new school, something that set her son off with regularity. The answer is the district's most restrictive behavioral program. The child may be an asshole and a violent psychopath, but the mother doesn't ask if there's perhaps anything wrong at the new school. There may well be, and the fact that she does not mention that possibility raises a red flag for me.
- grabastic 14y ago
  What is not clear about "black or khaki pants only"? I'm quite surprised that you've chosen to identify with the petulant, knife-wielding child in this article. Sure feels like you're bringing some personal baggage to the equation... this article is too short on details to draw the conclusions that you have.
  - guard-of-terra 14y ago
    I for one always identify myself with a sad kid. Why should not I? I was a kid and I was sad too and I could become mad if told what pants to wear.
    - grabastic 14y ago
      This is not just a sad kid and this is not just about pants. Did you ever grab a knife and threaten to kill your mom in front of your 7 and 9 year old siblings?
      - guard-of-terra 14y ago
        You're avoiding discussing action by discussing reaction. Of course grabbing a knife is not good, but that if all his bizzare reactions are due to kinds of nonsense?
  - bambax 14y ago
    This woman is insane and belongs in a mental institution, not her kids. This article articulates exactly what I think http://www.slate.com/blogs/xx_factor/2012/12/17/i_am_adam_lanza_s_mother_liza_lang_essay_libels_her_son.html http://www.slate.com/blogs/xx_factor/2012/12/17/i_am_adam_la...

by edanm 14y ago

jalada 14y ago

Adding to this. Many secondary (high) schools in England have a strict uniform policy. Dark blue trousers when black is the rule would get you sent home.

bambax 14y ago

I went to a boarding school in Ireland for a year, and they had a uniform -- but it was a uniform, not a "policy". There was one pair of trousers, one shirt and one pullover allowed, and they were provided by the school. This was fine with me; it was a very clear rule with only one interpretation possible, and it was completely external to my relation with my parents or in fact authority in general. You had to wear a uniform, you wore a uniform. I was quite rebellious but I never had a problem with that. My guess is the OP's kid resents arbitrary rules and the way they are enforced. At what point does "dark blue" cease to be dark? And why does this woman feel the need to enforce the school's rules? Why doesn't she let him see for himself what happens when you go to that school with a red pair of pants? Does she fear it will reflect poorly on her? I feel everything is about her, not him, and that's why he's so upset.

HarryHirsch 14y ago
> I feel everything is about her, not him, and that's why he's so upset. Indeed. It seems that the son has an exemption from the uniform policy ("They told me I could wear these" he insisted), the mother has this desire to make the child conform, and is insufficiently introspective to examine her own motivations ("my 13-year old son ... missed his bus because he was wearing the wrong color pants"). Hey, he missed the bus because you made him wear your favorite set of trousers.
- evan_ 14y ago
  You think the kid who thought threatening his mom with a knife was acceptable wouldn't tell a petty lie?
  - HarryHirsch 14y ago
    It's possible. But look at this: "Several weeks into his new junior high school, Michael began exhibiting increasingly odd and threatening behaviors at school. We decided to transfer him to the district’s most restrictive behavioral program" Something changed with the new school, something that set her son off with regularity. The answer is the district's most restrictive behavioral program. The child may be an asshole and a violent psychopath, but the mother doesn't ask if there's perhaps anything wrong at the new school. There may well be, and the fact that she does not mention that possibility raises a red flag for me.
grabastic 14y ago
What is not clear about "black or khaki pants only"? I'm quite surprised that you've chosen to identify with the petulant, knife-wielding child in this article. Sure feels like you're bringing some personal baggage to the equation... this article is too short on details to draw the conclusions that you have.
- guard-of-terra 14y ago
  I for one always identify myself with a sad kid. Why should not I? I was a kid and I was sad too and I could become mad if told what pants to wear.
  - grabastic 14y ago
    This is not just a sad kid and this is not just about pants. Did you ever grab a knife and threaten to kill your mom in front of your 7 and 9 year old siblings?
    - guard-of-terra 14y ago
      You're avoiding discussing action by discussing reaction. Of course grabbing a knife is not good, but that if all his bizzare reactions are due to kinds of nonsense?
- bambax 14y ago
  This woman is insane and belongs in a mental institution, not her kids. This article articulates exactly what I think http://www.slate.com/blogs/xx_factor/2012/12/17/i_am_adam_lanza_s_mother_liza_lang_essay_libels_her_son.html http://www.slate.com/blogs/xx_factor/2012/12/17/i_am_adam_la...