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I mean I've done very well in my life; my wife and I both moved up several classes, but I take ownership of educating my kids. My oldest started kindergarten to

I mean I've done very well in my life; my wife and I both moved up several classes, but I take ownership of educating my kids. My oldest started kindergarten today, but she's already a couple years ahead, and she's only really in school for social reasons. I don't think school is going to help you to avoid being duped. In fact, if these "elite" educations cost as much as a house, that is the first scam to avoid. Poor first lesson to fall for the upper middle class version of a gucci bag! Similarly, I plan for my kids to go to university, but for social reasons (it's the best place to find a spouse IMO), and that's exactly because I can see that the rational economic choice in the face of uncertainty is not to buy (or finance!) an expensive credential, but to buy a house and not fall for materialism. Books are free if your goal is to learn. An "elite" university is therefore less important than one with strong social pressures against things like casual relationships.

fn-mote 2mo ago
> one with strong social pressures against […] casual relationships. !! Not at all how I expected this to end. Calling it out so skimmers can see something interesting.
- ndriscoll 2mo ago
  Right, if you're at the level where you could afford the fanciest credentials, you don't actually need them. Then if you're upper middle class (so you don't have unlimited money, but they don't need the credentials), you need to ask why you'd send your kids to college at all. If you've raised an Ivy-calibre kid, presumably they can self-teach with the infinite resources available, so it's not about education. So the obvious reason for a decently well off family to send their kids to university is because it is far and away the best way to find the person they will marry. Casual dating squanders that opportunity (and promiscuity is linked to higher divorce rates if they do eventually find someone), and they'll never have that chance again. No different from giving your kid a trust to live on and watching them spend it on drugs and partying. If you're economically secure, immersion in a culture that normalizes positive values is the most important thing you can buy. In fact from that perspective, the hyper-competitive and ambitious culture (to the detriment of e.g. a fulfilling family life) of the Ivys is likely undesirable.

fn-mote 2mo ago

> one with strong social pressures against […] casual relationships. !! Not at all how I expected this to end. Calling it out so skimmers can see something interesting.

ndriscoll 2mo ago
Right, if you're at the level where you could afford the fanciest credentials, you don't actually need them. Then if you're upper middle class (so you don't have unlimited money, but they don't need the credentials), you need to ask why you'd send your kids to college at all. If you've raised an Ivy-calibre kid, presumably they can self-teach with the infinite resources available, so it's not about education. So the obvious reason for a decently well off family to send their kids to university is because it is far and away the best way to find the person they will marry. Casual dating squanders that opportunity (and promiscuity is linked to higher divorce rates if they do eventually find someone), and they'll never have that chance again. No different from giving your kid a trust to live on and watching them spend it on drugs and partying. If you're economically secure, immersion in a culture that normalizes positive values is the most important thing you can buy. In fact from that perspective, the hyper-competitive and ambitious culture (to the detriment of e.g. a fulfilling family life) of the Ivys is likely undesirable.