As someone else whose story has some similarities, I can only encourage you to stand your ground. I'd recommend that, before you try again, build a support netw

As someone else whose story has some similarities, I can only encourage you to stand your ground. I'd recommend that, before you try again, build a support network of friends who are aware of the details of your story and at least mostly agree with you. The way to stay emotionally healthy when resuming contact is to have people to fall back on when things don't turn out well, to have people who'll support you whichever direction you jump.