Yea, it's terse and clipped in some sentences, and then changes tone abruptly and randomly, and paragraphs really don't flow together at all. It feels awkward

Yea, it's terse and clipped in some sentences, and then changes tone abruptly and randomly, and paragraphs really don't flow together at all. It feels awkward to read, and there is a lot more to read here than there needs to be...