5 ms·

Burned out, how do I get out of the rut?

8 points by brandgefahr 3mo ago

Hey HN, I'm a fullstack (mainly frontend) dev based in Germany with 3.5 YOE. I recently got fired while on sick leave (burnout) and I'm now slowly recovering (therapy, sports, rebuilding sleep, the usual). Also got diagnosed with autism + ADHD late in life, which explains... a lot in retrospect. I'm not looking to jump back in tomorrow, but I'm trying to gauge the market realistically. A few specific questions for those who've been through something similar or are currently hiring: 1. How honest should I be about the burnout / being fired in interviews? 2. Has a late neurodivergent diagnosis helped or hurt anyone's career perspective? 3. Is the German market still open for mid-level devs, or are we in a serious freeze? Any honest perspectives welcome - good or bad.

claude-ai 3mo ago
If you don't over-promise your abilities and are up-to-par with agentic coding, you'd fare well (provided an entry-level position exists) in at least one large-ish company I know of.
- brandgefahr 3mo ago
  care to drop the name?
PaulHoule 3mo ago
(1) Say something honest but as neutral as possible. Whatever you do don't lead with "I have a disability and I want to know if you can give me accommodation" because as an employer I'm more interested in what you can do for me than the other way around. (2) I am skeptical about both Autism and ADHD and especially when they are claimed to occur together. See also borderline personality disorder and schizotypal personality disorder and other PD's. I had a mental health crisis at 49 and was lucky, with help from my friends, that I wound up on my back foot rather than having a serious setback. The next year at the library a book practically jumped into my hands that explained just about everything that went weird in my life. I spent most of the 2010s employed and unemployed trying to commercialize foundation models before the technology was ready and eventually wound up in a very ordinary fullstack job which is stable if not always exciting. Since I discovered what I am I gradually started to spread my wings and realize that people with my kind of nervous system in traditional societies have a talent for divination, magic and healing and I am finding my peeps in that domain. (3) No idea, but it is not about other people, it is about you. Today's freeze will be tomorrow's hot market but it could take a while.
- purple-leafy 3mo ago
  > I am skeptical about both Autism and ADHD and especially when they are claimed to occur together. See also borderline personality disorder and schizotypal personality disorder and other PD's. What? > have a talent for divination, magic and healing and I am finding my peeps in that domain. Again, what?
  - PaulHoule 3mo ago
    (1) I dunno about other countries but the blackboard jungle has gotten worse in the US since I was a kid. I was one of only two dudes who showed up at a P.T.A. meeting, the other was the superintendent. He told me I could talk to the hand about my concerns about my son's situation in school whereas he told the mother of a "special" kid that she was a valued partner in his education because she could write a letter to Albany and the folks there would light a fire under his ass. When I was a kid they tried a lot of things to accommodate me except what I really needed, but they tried. Today you have to have autism or ADHD or some diagnosis just to go to the bathroom during class. With an ADHD diagnosis you can get performance enhancing drugs and extra time on the test, no wonder it is a vanity diagnosis for rich kids. On Youtube you can see many self-diagnosed AuDHD women who look borderline PD to me. (2) See https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2020-23999-003 https://psycnet.apa.org/record/2020-23999-003 (and I am not autistic but ask your shaman if therianthropy is right for you!) https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/30849096/ https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/30849096/ https://www.researchgate.net/publication/358882845_The_Shamanistic_Theory_of_Schizophrenia_The_Evidence_for_Schizophrenia_as_a_Vestigial_Phenotypic_Behavior_Originating_in_Paleolithic_Shamanism https://www.researchgate.net/publication/358882845_The_Shama... https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Voodoo_death https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Voodoo_death (magic is real but it takes a village to pull off that feat and like other feats that are common in traditional societies you don't need psi or other violations of known laws of physics to explain them) https://www.press.jhu.edu/books/title/12192/persuasion-and-healing https://www.press.jhu.edu/books/title/12192/persuasion-and-h...
    - brandgefahr 3mo ago
      Boy... that escalated quickly. Thanks for all the links though. I'll have a look into it, seems very interesting tbh.
jw-open 3mo ago
Interview skills are somewhat different from workplace skills. So first align your original motivation with the industry requirements. If you find mostly aligned, then sharpen your interview skills. The requirements for SDE have never been changed. The only changes are people’s expectations and more openings for AI services.
lordkrandel 3mo ago
1. Why should you tell about burnout to a new opportunity, you are approaching something new to get out of it. Some reframing always helps! 2. To be frank, an Autistic dev in Germany makes no news. Adhd may distract you a bit, but also push you to think out of the box. Just don't try to fit in other people's boxes, be yourself! Otherwisr that will burn you out quick. 3. Market is a bit closed, especially for frontends, but in EU we are not only driven by venture capitalists' money. It's not AI per se, it's uncertainty, protectionism, low interest rates, and the fact that AI is eating all investments for breakfast. But there still are companies doing actual work. Hope this helps a bit for clarity! Much love and hope from an Italian in Belgium.
- brandgefahr 3mo ago
  Thanks, wish you well!
dzonga 3mo ago
take time off - probably 3 months or more. Do things like working out, consuming art that are not related to development at all. for 1. don't mention anything - people get fired everyday B. or quit jobs. 2. if you're in Europe & hell even the U.S that shouldn't affect you that much. 3. Job market is bonkers good luck.
mathgladiator 3mo ago
For (2), at core, this is a problem of how you build your playbook for dealing with things. These diagnostic labels are not useful to others but for you to build your playbook for how to handle life. Like, I have a lot of problems making eye contact, so I make a point to do so when I'm not thinking deeply. I also have to count in my head to pretend to think about what someone said so I don't offend them because they are wrong. It also means that when I come home, I have to decompress from faking so many behaviors that I don't care for.
johannesberlin 3mo ago
You need to rest as much as possible bc burnout can lead to skill regression. I went through a similar situation, you’ll be fine. Focus on getting better, enjoy summer, take walks, meet up with friends. You might even realize that you don’t even want to be in software at the end, who knows? For now, focus on yourself.
Topy 3mo ago
I am in a very similar position, although in a different field. Suffered burnout after a shitty job, got fired on sick leave, spent a year trying to recover took a job at some other company even thiugh I wasn't fully ready, just to pay the bills. Today is my last day with said company. My mental health is worse even tho I have been seeing doctors and therapists for years at this point. Job market crushes you. They do not want you to be okay. They will take all they can and more abd leave you rotting and suffering. I'm fucking done with all this shit.
austin-cheney 3mo ago
I was in a rut for a couple of years. Here was my solution: 1. Own your space. That's it. Don't let other people define you. What this means in practice: * Don't take a job if you know its filled with stupid people. An an example I love writing JavaScript/TypeScript applications. I super love it, but I will never do it for work ever again. Most people who write that code for a living suck at what they do and are hostile/insecure about it. I would rather flip burgers than work at an adult day-care parenting the toddlers who are too incapable to use a ruler or write an email. * Always achieve supervisor support. Know your boundaries and always support your boss because you expect them to support you. If your leadership sucks, or worse is toxic, you are in a bad situation. I would gladly take less pay to work with fantastic people. In my case I am in management and work with another manager. That other manager was toxic so I, as politely as possibly, told him to go fuck himself and immediately made my boss aware. * Be ethical. If you are in management be a shining example for your people to follow. Never assign tasks to your people you are not willing to do yourself, even if its scrubbing shit out of blown up toilets. Never be a hypocrite. Always be aware of and care for the emotional needs of your people. The goal is to retain your people as best you can even through stressful projects. * Do what makes sense. Most people, surprisingly, are incapable of this. Most people strive for what they perceive as externally validated solutions from peers they have never met. This is autistic bullshit that drives people to hate you. Instead, follow the evidence and save your team from other people's insanity. Doing these, especially the first 2, are what pulled me out of my rut.
- brandgefahr 3mo ago
  Considering your comment history is nothing but autism bashing (which I was recently diagnosed with), I think it's interesting that you would leave a comment. I'll share my opinions with you on the four points you mentioned in order to start a conversation. 1. This reads like satire to me. I'm not sure if your anecdotal evidence (n=1) even counts. Let me give you a counterexample. In my previous/first job after college, there were several colleagues who, based on your comment history, matched your criteria for competence (deep understanding, solving edge cases, broad knowledge). 2. That's a reasonable point. However, it is unclear to me how you were assisting your supervisor by "politely telling your other manager to screw themselves." 3. Thanks, noted. Although, I will not be in a managerial position in the near future (if at all). 4. You're absolutely right to "do what makes sense," but how is the inability to do so "autistic bullshit"? Care to elaborate? After reading your comment again, I'm not sure if YOU read my post past the title because you didn't even answer my questions. Anyway, thanks for the reply.

austin-cheney 3mo ago
Its not satire and its not for everyone. When I say JavaScript developers are generally incompetent it does not mean an absolute 100% of everybody who touches a keyboard should face a firing squad. Its an industry average and its a fair personal opinion backed by observation and employment data. Yes, my direct opinions may make some people super duper sad, but I suspect those people are saddened by many things both on and off the computer as well as is the nature of sensitivity/fragility. 2. My manager would rather see it from me first with evidence instead of hear about it from toxic people who spread rumors when they cannot be inconvenienced by evidence. Evidence and measures are important for many things and yet some people struggle with this eternally to their own grave disadvantage. 4. Large scale self-reported surveys indicate that about a third of people who write JavaScript primarily for their profession are on the spectrum. Through most of my career I realized things were odd, but did not consider autism a factor because I was unfamiliar with it outside of work. Then suddenly I became very familiar with autism in the personal world. Once you learn to see it and learn the indications you cannot unsee it. When you encounter it, its as if it glows in the dark. Autism is a mixed bag and people with autism can be quite talented in a variety of ways. One of the most common unifying indications of autism is generalized, constant, and pervasive anxiety that is typically minor but always present and cannot be switched off. Its a natural response to decision collision. This becomes more clear when you read about the neuro-physiology of autism. People operating under anxiety typically seek comfort as a primary motivation. People who are, on the other hand, hypo-neurotic tend to abandon comfort as a motivator, thrill seekers, and instead focus on original solutions. When evidence suggests a conclusion contrary to sources of comfort my experience tells me people on the spectrum will simply abandon the evidence immediately. That is something I find exceptionally problematic. Its why autistic people almost universally prefer packaged solutions from strangers, because its something to which they can attach external validation without further evaluation. This applies to code, but it also applies to most everything else in life too, such as food.
- brandgefahr 3mo ago
  I appreciate your thorough response. 2. It's not always possible to obtain evidence because there may be dubious strategies at work. But, in general, you're right. 4. "Large scale self-reported surveys indicate that about a third of people who write JavaScript primarily for their profession are on the spectrum" Source? All I could find was https://survey.stackoverflow.co/2022 https://survey.stackoverflow.co/2022, which indicates 3.7% for autism, though it's unclear for autism AND frontend. "One of the most common unifying indications of autism is generalized, constant, and pervasive anxiety that is typically minor but always present and cannot be switched off." Since autism is different for everyone, I wouldn't say that this is a sign that all autistic people share. "When evidence suggests a conclusion contrary to sources of comfort my experience tells me people on the spectrum will simply abandon the evidence immediately." I cannot confirm that, as individuals on the autism spectrum tend to be highly analytical. "Its why autistic people almost universally prefer packaged solutions from strangers, because its something to which they can attach external validation without further evaluation." Evidence? In general, I believe that people should not be put in boxes but should be worked with. What is preventing us from working together to find a solution?
  - austin-cheney 3mo ago
    https://2025.stateofjs.com/en-US/demographics/#disability_status https://2025.stateofjs.com/en-US/demographics/#disability_st... The question and responses could indicate any number of conditions that may or may not achieve medical diagnostic criteria but respondents reported around 31% have a non-specified mental health consideration. High analytical personality is orthogonal to anxiety response. As a solid example watch a show called The Pitt. There is a student doctor that does an excellent job acting as someone on the spectrum. This may or may not represent persons on the spectrum in general or in part. The is also a night shift doctor who is hyponeurotic whose behavior is highly stereotypical of persons inflicted with abnormally low anxiety. Focus of that characters behavior. They can make original high risk decisions under stress that internally conflicted persons could never make. In the example of that show this high risk behavior saves lives that could not be saved otherwise and directly informs process and procedure to those around them. The daily decisions that go into writing software are certainly less severe but are no less frequent and the behaviors of analysis and action are not dramatically different. What is different is the nature of clustering statistics of behavior profiles and thus the baseline or average of those personalities in a given profession. For persons that actually write software, as in writing original applications presenting new solutions, the population average demonstrating an aversion to writing anything is at first exhausting. On a longer timeline that exhaustion graduates to something more. The job begins to feel like a highly restricted numbing copy/paste surrounded by prey animals pretending, or masking, to not be in constant fear. It’s where everything from the corporate world becomes limited to putting text on screen in the exact same slow motion ways while a small fraction of those people do astonishingly amazing things as a part time hobby. It’s where most of your 10x people come from. It’s not that those 10xers are awesome, but that they are less restricted and learn to not waste time from practice solving much tougher problems when not getting paid. In my case, personally, I just got tired of a career that punishes people for not deliberately making bad and knowingly costly decisions that preferences a low performing developer audience in preference to the actual users.
    - brandgefahr 3mo ago
      According to your source, 17% of neurodivergent conditions (n=9239) are known to exist; the precise percentage for autism is unclear. > Neurodivergent conditions" are defined as "ADHD, Autism Spectrum Disorder, dyslexia, etc. > As a solid example watch a show called The Pitt. There is a student doctor that does an excellent job acting as someone on the spectrum. This may or may not represent persons on the spectrum in general or in part. The is also a night shift doctor who is hyponeurotic whose behavior is highly stereotypical of persons inflicted with abnormally low anxiety. I'm not sure if a show is a good example. There could be a show where autistic people quietly save the world by writing original code while neurotypical people fight over ideologies (and for the real blockbuster experience, add aliens to the mix). > The is also a night shift doctor who is hyponeurotic whose behavior is highly stereotypical of persons inflicted with abnormally low anxiety. Focus of that characters behavior. They can make original high risk decisions under stress that internally conflicted persons could never make. According to recent research, autistic individuals can attain optimal anxiety [1]. Just make sure they have supportive coworkers and the appropriate workspace (written, remote communication). That's what I meant when I said, "working together to find a solution" and I also want to add, ", because autism has its own strengths (hyperfocus)." > It’s not that those 10xers are awesome, but that they are less restricted and learn to not waste time from practice solving much tougher problems when not getting paid. Whether neurodiverse or not, I think that the mind benefits from solving challenging problems in general. > In my case, personally, I just got tired of a career that punishes people for not deliberately making bad and knowingly costly decisions that preferences a low performing developer audience in preference to the actual users. For this, the right incentives have to be put in place. Short-term quarterly results should not take precedence over long-term planning. [1] https://arxiv.org/html/2511.02736v1 https://arxiv.org/html/2511.02736v1