5 ms·

SoftBank 2026 AGM [pdf]

67 points by dmmalam 3mo ago

dgellow 3mo ago
Pure trolling as a strategy... Golden quotes: "It was the goose that created value: 74 - 3 = 71"[0] "Golden Egg factory inside the goose"[1] 0: see page 49 1: see page 55
- deleted 3mo ago
  [deleted]
Michelangelo11 3mo ago
I love how in the slide with "It was the goose that created value", the goose has its wings raised. The goose is ... triumphant. Ascendant. Its arc is complete: after being valued at $0, the goose is recognized for the inexhaustible source of value it is. The goose is vindicated. And finally, in the denouement, we see the goose in serene repose. "It is the Goose itself," we are told, in bold, confident lettering. This is what matters. Not the eggs. I hope lasagnacat can come back, do a special on this, and hire John Barrymore for the narration, as a spiritual sequel to their Pipe Strip video (https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=NAh9oLs67Cw https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=NAh9oLs67Cw).
stosssik 3mo ago
Original approach for their annual shareholder decks. I liek that.
neonstatic 3mo ago
When slop meets stock photos
- aabhay 3mo ago
  I think the beauty of this is that you know it can’t possibly have been ai generated
NeutralForest 3mo ago
The only thing I got from the presentation is that I still underrate geese, gotta put some respect on their feathered name.
JdeBP 3mo ago
If your reaction is 'What the Hell is this?', read this for background: * https://reuters.com/business/media-telecom/talk-bubble-is-an-insult-ai-says-softbanks-son-2026-06-24/ https://reuters.com/business/media-telecom/talk-bubble-is-an... Then notice that the metal construction robot needs toe protectors on its boots. Then notice that the slides have small print.
- deleted 3mo ago
  [deleted]
- wunderlotus 3mo ago
  > One shareholder, who described herself as a "simple housewife," asked Son to nominate her son to the board of directors. "You have great vision and skill," she said. "I would like my son to become like you." "I'll keep that in mind," Son replied. Goose matters aside, this was my favorite part.
usagisushi 3mo ago
Back in 2014, Son also gave me a good laugh with a slide comparing: > Von Neumann computer: powered by programming vs. Personal robot: powered by family happiness. https://i.gzn.jp/img/2014/06/05/softbank-conference/snap3014.jpg https://i.gzn.jp/img/2014/06/05/softbank-conference/snap3014... His sense of humor has only reached new heights since then.
shigawire 3mo ago
This makes me feel like a spend too much time on slides for my rinky dink enterprise software feature projects.
netless 3mo ago
Surreal
fairity 3mo ago
Here's the talk that went along with this deck (for those who would prefer not immediately jumping to ridicule): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DtM0Cjb0dEU https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DtM0Cjb0dEU
bebeal 3mo ago
what the fuck is this lmao
- sph 3mo ago
  Hype manifest
cyanydeez 3mo ago
So like, this is one of those Spherical Cows in physics, where the theory ignores everything about the externalities and focuses just on some random equation in physics. Just like the idea that we could mine asteroids for $quadrillions$ so we should invest in asteroid mining. For AGI, the only way it's actually profitable is if you're a sociopath who uses it for enslavement of the human race; just like the valuations of AI assume _everyone_ would be the "total addressable market". Just pure psychopathy with no reason.

67 points by dmmalam 3mo ago

Pure trolling as a strategy... Golden quotes: "It was the goose that created value: 74 - 3 = 71"[0] "Golden Egg factory inside the goose"[1] 0: see page 49 1: see page 55

deleted 3mo ago
[deleted]

Michelangelo11 3mo ago

I love how in the slide with "It was the goose that created value", the goose has its wings raised. The goose is ... triumphant. Ascendant. Its arc is complete: after being valued at $0, the goose is recognized for the inexhaustible source of value it is. The goose is vindicated. And finally, in the denouement, we see the goose in serene repose. "It is the Goose itself," we are told, in bold, confident lettering. This is what matters. Not the eggs. I hope lasagnacat can come back, do a special on this, and hire John Barrymore for the narration, as a spiritual sequel to their Pipe Strip video (https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=NAh9oLs67Cw https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=NAh9oLs67Cw).

stosssik 3mo ago

Original approach for their annual shareholder decks. I liek that.

neonstatic 3mo ago

When slop meets stock photos

aabhay 3mo ago
I think the beauty of this is that you know it can’t possibly have been ai generated

NeutralForest 3mo ago

The only thing I got from the presentation is that I still underrate geese, gotta put some respect on their feathered name.

JdeBP 3mo ago

If your reaction is 'What the Hell is this?', read this for background: * https://reuters.com/business/media-telecom/talk-bubble-is-an-insult-ai-says-softbanks-son-2026-06-24/ https://reuters.com/business/media-telecom/talk-bubble-is-an... Then notice that the metal construction robot needs toe protectors on its boots. Then notice that the slides have small print.

deleted 3mo ago
[deleted]
wunderlotus 3mo ago
> One shareholder, who described herself as a "simple housewife," asked Son to nominate her son to the board of directors. "You have great vision and skill," she said. "I would like my son to become like you." "I'll keep that in mind," Son replied. Goose matters aside, this was my favorite part.

usagisushi 3mo ago

Back in 2014, Son also gave me a good laugh with a slide comparing: > Von Neumann computer: powered by programming vs. Personal robot: powered by family happiness. https://i.gzn.jp/img/2014/06/05/softbank-conference/snap3014.jpg https://i.gzn.jp/img/2014/06/05/softbank-conference/snap3014... His sense of humor has only reached new heights since then.

shigawire 3mo ago

This makes me feel like a spend too much time on slides for my rinky dink enterprise software feature projects.

netless 3mo ago

Surreal

fairity 3mo ago

Here's the talk that went along with this deck (for those who would prefer not immediately jumping to ridicule): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DtM0Cjb0dEU https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DtM0Cjb0dEU

bebeal 3mo ago

what the fuck is this lmao

sph 3mo ago
Hype manifest

cyanydeez 3mo ago

So like, this is one of those Spherical Cows in physics, where the theory ignores everything about the externalities and focuses just on some random equation in physics. Just like the idea that we could mine asteroids for $quadrillions$ so we should invest in asteroid mining. For AGI, the only way it's actually profitable is if you're a sociopath who uses it for enslavement of the human race; just like the valuations of AI assume _everyone_ would be the "total addressable market". Just pure psychopathy with no reason.