It sounds like you should set your sights lower. You don't seem to have an aversion to trying or thinking. I'd hope the explanation for your failures is that yo

It sounds like you should set your sights lower. You don't seem to have an aversion to trying or thinking. I'd hope the explanation for your failures is that you didn't acquire the prerequisites and are continually trying to fake or skip them. But that's unlikely. So, discover what you are capable of. There's no shame in trying and being average, instead of not trying and being below average.