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This story has a strong "life sucks then you die" vibe going for it. And the afterlife also sucks apparently (although I don't personally believe in an afterlif

This story has a strong "life sucks then you die" vibe going for it. And the afterlife also sucks apparently (although I don't personally believe in an afterlife). Hopelessness and injustice seem to be the current zeitgeist - at least for anyone who spends a lot of time online. And I get it, there's plenty to be unhappy about. But my counter-argument is that it's possible to do things in life that you're proud of. And find happiness in the simplest of places. And most people would do better to focus the majority of their attention on those things. This story says "do yourself a favour and forgive yourself for any failings on your part, you’re only human after all" - which I agree with. But I'd go one step further and add "celebrate your successes" and try to align your life in such a way that you can have successes worthy of celebrating. It makes me wonder: with everyone seemingly so unhappy, why aren't there more people pursuing alternative lifestyles? Similar to the 60s counterculture. You don't need the whole world to go along with you - just a handful (or less) of likeminded people. Or some people even manage to go it alone. It seems a lot of people (perhaps a vocal minority?) actually enjoy being upset. Or maybe everyone is going through ups and downs but we just tend to be more vocal when we're upset.

smnplk 4mo ago
> And the afterlife also sucks apparently (although I don't personally believe in an afterlife). Why don't you believe in the experience after dying ?
- freetime2 4mo ago
  I think that once the power supply to my brain shuts down, that's likely the end of my conscious experience.
- BLKNSLVR 4mo ago
  I'm going to say it will be similar to the experience prior to birth / conception, ie. we were nothing, and to nothing we shall return. It's a scary feeling if you can grasp it. Grasping non-existence from within existence is difficult, I've consciously tried to do it and succeeded a couple of times, but it's fleeting and both times it affected my breathing and heart rate in a similar way to fear or panic or pain.
  - whatshisface 4mo ago
    As someone who was born, I can attest that the experience of not being born consisted of billions of years passing by in an imperceptibly short instant, followed by being five.
  - canyp 4mo ago
    I go through that exercise of visualizing the void and it is fascinating and terrifying at the same time, especially if you do it before going to sleep. That being said, you can't just assume that existence is bounded by your living memories. You might as well have been everything instead of nothing prior to being spawned and you just don't remember it.
    - ed_mercer 4mo ago
      I've always wondered why doing it before sleep amplifies the anxiety
      - canyp 4mo ago
        I believe the fact that it is night time does a lot to it, since we're just wired for a healthy fear of the dark. Coupled with consciousness fading into sleep, it seems to open up a lot of dread.
    - BLKNSLVR 4mo ago
      > you can't just assume that existence is bounded by your living memories I was going to raise that, but couldn't find a short enough way to describe it properly. Something like: Existence beyond what you can actually remember doesn't matter because it's outside any bounds of practical discussion; it should be excluded from consideration. The same way it's impossible to predict anything 'before the big bang' because we only have 'after the big bang' as useful evidence. There is no way to verify any continuity if you can't remember it or if there is no evidence of it. There's no guarantee you can even comprehend what it could be, 'you' as a concept may not even exist and it's unlikely to be relate-able to anything in this living world. Maybe you return to being 0.00001% of the collective consciousness of the universe, or any other crackpot thing anyone wants to suggest. Flying Spaghetti Monster.".
- queenkjuul 4mo ago
  Dead brains don't feel
jimmaswell 4mo ago
> why aren't there more people pursuing alternative lifestyles? Similar to the 60s counterculture. I think the brony and furry community count for some examples. Brony community has been a major counter-culture since its inception and I truly believe it's had a measurable impact on gender norms and some other areas. Many of us see it as something of a lifestyle where it dominates the spaces we primarily engage in etc. Furry is even bigger and easier to argue as a popular counterculture lifestyle, and growing all the time (record convention attendance every year). They're also places where some other things like polyamory are more common, and much more LGBT/etc inclusive than average (which is less of a statement now, but they were both far ahead of the curve on that years ago), refreshingly sex-positive (at least the parts of the communities I identify with). Personally all of those things apply to me and I love being a part of those communities. Brony community has been a hugely important thing in my life since high school and working on game development there was a big jumpstart on experience working in a team/technical experience. Furry I only started exploring more a few years ago but I've made a lot of great friends and met my current partners there too. Brony's a consistent core of lifetime holdouts like me and a steady trickle of new people at this point, and furry's growing faster all the time - even the little bonfire meetup at a nature preserve I like to go to had a record smashing attendance on opening day this year.
- freetime2 4mo ago
  While brony and furry weren't exactly what I had in mind, I think you're 100% correct. And also a great example of finding happiness in simple places. Whatever gets your juices flowing (figuratively speaking).
- kunai 4mo ago
  I thought bronyism sort of died out and that the furry community sort of subsumed it. I'd also add that I think the increased self-ID of young people in the LGBTQ community is in and of itself sort of a means to access a sort of alternative lifestyle. Many of these people live somewhat hedonistic, bohemian, artsy lifestyles that disregard traditional notions of success or traditional standards and mores in relationships and love.
8note 4mo ago
> why aren't there more people pursuing alternative lifestyles? generally land costs
_factor 4mo ago
It’s not the lifestyle that makes some people unhappy, it’s the knowledge that there is suffering around the world they can do near nothing to stop. Not everyone frames their happiness solely on conditions within their own sphere. Knowledge comes with responsibility.
- GlickWick 4mo ago
  I agree to the extent that you can impact things around you, but is the general chaos and suffering in the world outside of that sphere really a responsibility? At some point you have to accept you can really only impact the sphere unless you end up being a major historical figure.
  - deleted 4mo ago
    [deleted]
  - vineyardmike 4mo ago
    I think one of life's big questions is defining the size of your sphere of responsibility. Some people decide that sphere is really big, and they go on to be those historical figures. Others define it really big, and wallow in angst, aware and powerless to the suffering. Others still define it too small, and by the end of their life, find regret that they didn't try to help those within reach.
    - deleted 4mo ago
      [deleted]
- xg15 4mo ago
  Yeah, a bit of this. Speaking from Europe, there is the latent feeling of war, and the fear that an even larger one may come. It's also becoming increasingly clear what kind of visions the powerful people are trying to realize, and don't have much to do with the kind of optimistic visions for the future that I grew up with. Lastly there is a feeling of helplessness in the face of all this. There is still a lot of counterculture in spite of all this - and honestly, it even feels more enticing than it used to. But it also feels more hedonistic and escapist than like a genuine alternative way of living. Things feel less like the 1980s and more like the 1920s...

smnplk 4mo ago

> And the afterlife also sucks apparently (although I don't personally believe in an afterlife). Why don't you believe in the experience after dying ?

freetime2 4mo ago
I think that once the power supply to my brain shuts down, that's likely the end of my conscious experience.
BLKNSLVR 4mo ago
I'm going to say it will be similar to the experience prior to birth / conception, ie. we were nothing, and to nothing we shall return. It's a scary feeling if you can grasp it. Grasping non-existence from within existence is difficult, I've consciously tried to do it and succeeded a couple of times, but it's fleeting and both times it affected my breathing and heart rate in a similar way to fear or panic or pain.
- whatshisface 4mo ago
  As someone who was born, I can attest that the experience of not being born consisted of billions of years passing by in an imperceptibly short instant, followed by being five.
- canyp 4mo ago
  I go through that exercise of visualizing the void and it is fascinating and terrifying at the same time, especially if you do it before going to sleep. That being said, you can't just assume that existence is bounded by your living memories. You might as well have been everything instead of nothing prior to being spawned and you just don't remember it.
  - ed_mercer 4mo ago
    I've always wondered why doing it before sleep amplifies the anxiety
    - canyp 4mo ago
      I believe the fact that it is night time does a lot to it, since we're just wired for a healthy fear of the dark. Coupled with consciousness fading into sleep, it seems to open up a lot of dread.
  - BLKNSLVR 4mo ago
    > you can't just assume that existence is bounded by your living memories I was going to raise that, but couldn't find a short enough way to describe it properly. Something like: Existence beyond what you can actually remember doesn't matter because it's outside any bounds of practical discussion; it should be excluded from consideration. The same way it's impossible to predict anything 'before the big bang' because we only have 'after the big bang' as useful evidence. There is no way to verify any continuity if you can't remember it or if there is no evidence of it. There's no guarantee you can even comprehend what it could be, 'you' as a concept may not even exist and it's unlikely to be relate-able to anything in this living world. Maybe you return to being 0.00001% of the collective consciousness of the universe, or any other crackpot thing anyone wants to suggest. Flying Spaghetti Monster.".
queenkjuul 4mo ago
Dead brains don't feel

jimmaswell 4mo ago

> why aren't there more people pursuing alternative lifestyles? Similar to the 60s counterculture. I think the brony and furry community count for some examples. Brony community has been a major counter-culture since its inception and I truly believe it's had a measurable impact on gender norms and some other areas. Many of us see it as something of a lifestyle where it dominates the spaces we primarily engage in etc. Furry is even bigger and easier to argue as a popular counterculture lifestyle, and growing all the time (record convention attendance every year). They're also places where some other things like polyamory are more common, and much more LGBT/etc inclusive than average (which is less of a statement now, but they were both far ahead of the curve on that years ago), refreshingly sex-positive (at least the parts of the communities I identify with). Personally all of those things apply to me and I love being a part of those communities. Brony community has been a hugely important thing in my life since high school and working on game development there was a big jumpstart on experience working in a team/technical experience. Furry I only started exploring more a few years ago but I've made a lot of great friends and met my current partners there too. Brony's a consistent core of lifetime holdouts like me and a steady trickle of new people at this point, and furry's growing faster all the time - even the little bonfire meetup at a nature preserve I like to go to had a record smashing attendance on opening day this year.

freetime2 4mo ago
While brony and furry weren't exactly what I had in mind, I think you're 100% correct. And also a great example of finding happiness in simple places. Whatever gets your juices flowing (figuratively speaking).
kunai 4mo ago
I thought bronyism sort of died out and that the furry community sort of subsumed it. I'd also add that I think the increased self-ID of young people in the LGBTQ community is in and of itself sort of a means to access a sort of alternative lifestyle. Many of these people live somewhat hedonistic, bohemian, artsy lifestyles that disregard traditional notions of success or traditional standards and mores in relationships and love.

8note 4mo ago

> why aren't there more people pursuing alternative lifestyles? generally land costs

_factor 4mo ago

It’s not the lifestyle that makes some people unhappy, it’s the knowledge that there is suffering around the world they can do near nothing to stop. Not everyone frames their happiness solely on conditions within their own sphere. Knowledge comes with responsibility.

GlickWick 4mo ago
I agree to the extent that you can impact things around you, but is the general chaos and suffering in the world outside of that sphere really a responsibility? At some point you have to accept you can really only impact the sphere unless you end up being a major historical figure.
- deleted 4mo ago
  [deleted]
- vineyardmike 4mo ago
  I think one of life's big questions is defining the size of your sphere of responsibility. Some people decide that sphere is really big, and they go on to be those historical figures. Others define it really big, and wallow in angst, aware and powerless to the suffering. Others still define it too small, and by the end of their life, find regret that they didn't try to help those within reach.
  - deleted 4mo ago
    [deleted]
xg15 4mo ago
Yeah, a bit of this. Speaking from Europe, there is the latent feeling of war, and the fear that an even larger one may come. It's also becoming increasingly clear what kind of visions the powerful people are trying to realize, and don't have much to do with the kind of optimistic visions for the future that I grew up with. Lastly there is a feeling of helplessness in the face of all this. There is still a lot of counterculture in spite of all this - and honestly, it even feels more enticing than it used to. But it also feels more hedonistic and escapist than like a genuine alternative way of living. Things feel less like the 1980s and more like the 1920s...