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There's nothing wrong with having children and having that experience be a great one. However, that kind of story is the dominant narrative in US society and pe
by king_jester 14y ago
There's nothing wrong with having children and having that experience be a great one. However, that kind of story is the dominant narrative in US society and people deserve to hear alternative points of view and experience for those where it didn't turn out OK or as a positive experience. Those kinds of stories and experiences don't get a lot of exposure, esp. in regards to media representation and cultural norms.
> Why don't those unhappy parents give up their kids for adoption?
The article went over this, as there are a wide variety of reasons someone has a child, planned or not. Some people may have children that they were forced to, or may find that the life they imagined having with children never materialized and that they do not want to continue being a parent. Also, cultural norms and representations of parenthood and expectations of how to interact with children heavily influence the perception of being a parent, so when these norms leave out the experience of people who regret or are not happy with being a parent, we are misleading people. Adoption and foster care systems are not a perfect solution, it would be better to provide more information and experiences for people to help them evaluate whether or not a child would be for them.
- Tichy 14y agoIn general I suppose it is bad if people can't be honest with their feelings. As one extreme example, I think post-pregnancy depression is actually quite common and can even drive mothers to suicide. Since they can not talk about it because they are supposed to be happy, they often don't get proper treatment. As for helping people evaluate, that seems tricky. How could you simulate the experience of having kids? I guess most people just extrapolate from what they see around them and what they experienced in their own families. And on the case of unwanted pregnancies it wouldn't help anyway.