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Dharmesh classifies himself as a "complete introvert". And his behavior with respect to phones is consistent with that. But I find it hard to believe that he

by arscan 14y ago

Dharmesh classifies himself as a "complete introvert". And his behavior with respect to phones is consistent with that. But I find it hard to believe that he has gotten to where he is today by taking this kind of hardline attitude w/all the ways that his introversion manifests itself (it makes me anxious, therefore I won't do it, sorry). I'm pretty sure that all the public speaking that he does makes him nervous as hell (he usually begins his talks by admitting that), but he does it anyway. As a fellow introvert, I am constantly trying to decide when to push myself out of my comfort zone (because it would be good for my career), and when I should just accept the way that I am and seek to add value in ways that I am most comfortable. I'd love to see Dharmesh write about how he came to the decision of where to draw that line; e.g. phone calls are out, but public speaking is in. A takeaway from this article could be "don't try to be something you're not", but I feel that its a bit more complicated than that based on what I (think I) know about him.

LaGrange 14y ago
It's not taking a hardline attitude. If you have, for example, Aspergers, unplanned, unscheduled conversations cause incredible anxiety and are extremely hard to manage. This leads to miscommunication, arguments and pointless stress. And there's no "taking myself out of my comfort zone" that would help, I'm already out of my comfort zone whenever I talk live to someone who isn't one of the half dozen closest people in my life. And even with them it gets tricky sometimes. As for public speaking, it's actually a fairly scripted and controlled situation. A good middle-ground would probably be something like leading a table-top RPG game, though for me that's already in the realms of fantasies, and I'm pretty sure I'm doing pretty well all things considered. Anyway, the point is: some of us have our special needs. Some people need extra control over conversations due to their inherent vulnerability. It's not just introversion, it's often anxieties and social disorders. I'm still a pretty great coder that can get along with a team of living, breathing people, and deal with a stand-up every day, but an unannounced meeting — not so much.

by arscan 14y ago

LaGrange 14y ago

It's not taking a hardline attitude. If you have, for example, Aspergers, unplanned, unscheduled conversations cause incredible anxiety and are extremely hard to manage. This leads to miscommunication, arguments and pointless stress. And there's no "taking myself out of my comfort zone" that would help, I'm already out of my comfort zone whenever I talk live to someone who isn't one of the half dozen closest people in my life. And even with them it gets tricky sometimes. As for public speaking, it's actually a fairly scripted and controlled situation. A good middle-ground would probably be something like leading a table-top RPG game, though for me that's already in the realms of fantasies, and I'm pretty sure I'm doing pretty well all things considered. Anyway, the point is: some of us have our special needs. Some people need extra control over conversations due to their inherent vulnerability. It's not just introversion, it's often anxieties and social disorders. I'm still a pretty great coder that can get along with a team of living, breathing people, and deal with a stand-up every day, but an unannounced meeting — not so much.