4 ms·

Deterrent can be an effective form of rehab. A former coworker of mine walks funny because he had polio as a child, and his father worked for the railway union

Deterrent can be an effective form of rehab. A former coworker of mine walks funny because he had polio as a child, and his father worked for the railway union after WWII. He told me one day in high school, one of his friends came to school with bruises couldn’t hide, inflicted by his drunk father. Everyone in school knew, everyone in town knew, but no one did anything. My coworker informed his dad, about the egregious injuries that day. His dad drove to the drunk man’s house and knocked on the door and seized the drunk man by the collar: “if you ever touch that boy again, I’ll kill you.” The threat must have been believable coming from a rail union worker, because it rehabilitated the recipient’s decision making processes going forward.

jitler 5mo ago
> My coworker informed his dad, about the egregious injuries that day. His dad drove to the drunk man’s house and knocked on the door and seized the drunk man by the collar: “if you ever touch that boy again, I’ll kill you.” Yeah that wouldn’t fly nowadays. Your friend’s father would be hot with a slew of charges from “terroristic threats” to “meanacing”
lava_pidgeon 5mo ago
And today the drunk father would lose the responsibility for his child which is a better and non violent answer.
- elevation 5mo ago
  > father would lose the responsibility for his child This HN discussion of systemic abuse in US Catholic orphanages last century also discusses vast, documented ongoing abuse in both religious and state run care/foster systems around the globe. Statistically, these systems cause more abuse than they prevent, and should only be a last resort. [0]: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=17852129 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=17852129
  - lava_pidgeon 5mo ago
    Why do you assume that it works such in America = world wide? I was in such a system but I was a relief. But not America
    - elevation 5mo ago
      I'm not an expert in all nations but systemic abuse in abuse prevention systems is not uniquely american. For instance, the British care system seems consistent with American results - a Brit I talked to told me that in year, roughly 1 in 2 children report sexual abuse at the hands of their caretaker or an older child. It's hard to tell the extent of the unreported abuses. And yet, widespread abuses doesn't preclude the possibility of children escaping unharmed. I'm glad you made it through.
      - lava_pidgeon 5mo ago
        This is a horrendous rate. But given the discussion context the success rate of a punch into the face of an alcoholic father is less than 50 % (I claim that given my knowledge with alcoholism) so even the bad British system is better. Also given the lack of scandals in the German system (better most scandals are about how the system wasn't strict enough against abusive parents) I see it is clearly possible to build a better system.
BobaFloutist 5mo ago
> He told me one day in high school, one of his friends came to school with bruises couldn’t hide, inflicted by his drunk father. Sorry, you're telling this story as a way of supporting beating kids...?

jitler 5mo ago

> My coworker informed his dad, about the egregious injuries that day. His dad drove to the drunk man’s house and knocked on the door and seized the drunk man by the collar: “if you ever touch that boy again, I’ll kill you.” Yeah that wouldn’t fly nowadays. Your friend’s father would be hot with a slew of charges from “terroristic threats” to “meanacing”

lava_pidgeon 5mo ago

And today the drunk father would lose the responsibility for his child which is a better and non violent answer.

elevation 5mo ago
> father would lose the responsibility for his child This HN discussion of systemic abuse in US Catholic orphanages last century also discusses vast, documented ongoing abuse in both religious and state run care/foster systems around the globe. Statistically, these systems cause more abuse than they prevent, and should only be a last resort. [0]: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=17852129 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=17852129
- lava_pidgeon 5mo ago
  Why do you assume that it works such in America = world wide? I was in such a system but I was a relief. But not America
  - elevation 5mo ago
    I'm not an expert in all nations but systemic abuse in abuse prevention systems is not uniquely american. For instance, the British care system seems consistent with American results - a Brit I talked to told me that in year, roughly 1 in 2 children report sexual abuse at the hands of their caretaker or an older child. It's hard to tell the extent of the unreported abuses. And yet, widespread abuses doesn't preclude the possibility of children escaping unharmed. I'm glad you made it through.
    - lava_pidgeon 5mo ago
      This is a horrendous rate. But given the discussion context the success rate of a punch into the face of an alcoholic father is less than 50 % (I claim that given my knowledge with alcoholism) so even the bad British system is better. Also given the lack of scandals in the German system (better most scandals are about how the system wasn't strict enough against abusive parents) I see it is clearly possible to build a better system.

BobaFloutist 5mo ago

> He told me one day in high school, one of his friends came to school with bruises couldn’t hide, inflicted by his drunk father. Sorry, you're telling this story as a way of supporting beating kids...?