3 ms·

Yes, yes, but when was your last period? This even translates to the pediatric space. I took all of my kids to the pediatrician because either they don't make

Yes, yes, but when was your last period? This even translates to the pediatric space. I took all of my kids to the pediatrician because either they don't make comments to me like they do to my wife, or I don't take shit from them. I'm not sure which. Here's an example: My wife and daughter were there and the doctor asked what kind of milk my daughter was drinking. She said "whole milk" and the doctor made a comment along the lines of "Wow, mom, you really need to switch to 2%". To understand this, though, you need to understand that my daughter was _small_. Like they had to staple a 2nd sheet of paper to the weight chart because she was below the available graph space. It wasn't from lack of food or anything like that, she's just small and didn't have much of an appetite. So I became the one to take the kids there. Instead of chastising me, they literally prescribed cheeseburgers and fettuccine alfredo. My daughter is in her 20s now and is still small -- it's just the way she is. When she goes to see her primary, do you know what their first question is? "When was your last period."

thaumasiotes 5mo ago
> My daughter is in her 20s now and is still small -- it's just the way she is. When she goes to see her primary, do you know what their first question is? "When was your last period." Is that supposed to be a problem? How does it connect to the story in your comment? The question seems to be warranted to me, since being underweight can stop you from menstruating. So if you find someone thin and her last period was off in the distant past, you can conclude that there's a problem and something should be done about it; if it was a couple of weeks ago, you can conclude that she's fine. (It could also just be something that is automatically assessed as a potential indicator of all kinds of different things. Notably pregnancy. For me, it bothered me that whenever you have an appointment at Kaiser for any reason, part of their checkin procedure is asking you how tall you are. I'd answer, but eventually I started pointing out to them that I wasn't ever measuring my height and they were just getting the same answer from my memory over and over again. [By contrast, they also take your weight every time, but they do that by putting you on a scale and reading it off.] The fact that my height wasn't being remeasured didn't bother them; I'm not sure what that question is for.)
- fullstop 5mo ago
  You're very much over thinking this. That's the first question every doctor asks a woman, and legitimate problems are often overlooked because of it.
- kaikai 5mo ago
  I’m a normal weight, and get asked the same question. More importantly, I can tell them, “I have a regular cycle” and they WILL NOT take that as an answer. I HAVE to give them a date, and they will ask me to make one up if I can’t remember or want to decline giving them that information. Particularly given the alarming stories of people being prosecuted for having miscarriages, it feels ridiculous. If anything I hope more automated diagnostics and triage could help women and POC get better care, but only if there’s safeguards against prejudice. There’s studies showing different rates of pain management across races and sexes, for example. A broken bone is a broken bone, regardless of sex or race.
  - thaumasiotes 5mo ago
    > and they will ask me to make one up if I can’t remember or want to decline giving them that information Doesn't this suggest that they don't care what the answer is?
    - rrr_oh_man 5mo ago
      It sounds like a form to be filled out…
    - kaikai 5mo ago
      They, as an individual healthcare provider, don’t care. The system will not allow them to ignore it, though, so the system cares very much.
      - thaumasiotes 5mo ago
        OK. What is this fact supposed to teach us?
codewench 5mo ago
Yes? That's a very important piece of information, and I hope would be a thing a doctor asks, especially if there are concerns about weight or nutrition.
- fullstop 5mo ago
  She's not there about her weight, though. I highly encourage you to talk to women about their experiences here. The weight thing was not the key aspect of my original comment. They chastised my wife for continuing to give my daughter whole milk while being underweight, but did not make similar comments to me. That was the point. For women, their pains and problems are far too often whisked away by hand waving and "it's hormones and periods" and serious issues are often overlooked. Very little has changed in that area over the last twenty years.
tacticus 5mo ago
medical industry must be going for some long term achievement in how much they disbelieve, mistreat, and degrade women going to them. I wonder how many units of their training courses are spent on this and how much is spent on the cultural reinforcement of it.
- fullstop 5mo ago
  Yes, let's pretend that the bias does not exist, that is helpful. It certainly doesn't have to do with the fact that it's currently a 60/40 split in active male vs female physicians. Or that women are more likely to be taken seriously by doctors: * https://www.health.harvard.edu/pain/the-dangerous-dismissal-of-womens-pain * https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC10937548/ Are you really unwilling to admit that such a bias exists?
  - heartbreak 5mo ago
    This seems like an especially bad faith interpretation of the comment you were responding to.
fn-mote 5mo ago
My experiences broadly support your conclusions. However, your argument focuses on the routine intake instead of any listening part. The fact that the doctor measures height, weight, temperature, and blood pressure on intake and then asks about LMP doesn’t surprise me… that’s the part of the script where you just provide the data before you bring up concerns. Not to say the doctor was not a jerk, just that your argument doesn’t do much for me.
kortilla 5mo ago
Why would they suggest switching to a lower fat percentage milk?
- bmicraft 5mo ago
  My dumb answer would be that less fat means more sugar per kcal, so less satiety per kcal. No idea if that's correct.
  - pixel_popping 5mo ago
    Incorrect, not all products that reduce fat necessarily increases carb/sugar content.
    - bmicraft 5mo ago
      Wrong. If you just take out the fat you've necessarily got more of everything else per kcal. I didn't say per volume, I said per kcal.

thaumasiotes 5mo ago

> My daughter is in her 20s now and is still small -- it's just the way she is. When she goes to see her primary, do you know what their first question is? "When was your last period." Is that supposed to be a problem? How does it connect to the story in your comment? The question seems to be warranted to me, since being underweight can stop you from menstruating. So if you find someone thin and her last period was off in the distant past, you can conclude that there's a problem and something should be done about it; if it was a couple of weeks ago, you can conclude that she's fine. (It could also just be something that is automatically assessed as a potential indicator of all kinds of different things. Notably pregnancy. For me, it bothered me that whenever you have an appointment at Kaiser for any reason, part of their checkin procedure is asking you how tall you are. I'd answer, but eventually I started pointing out to them that I wasn't ever measuring my height and they were just getting the same answer from my memory over and over again. [By contrast, they also take your weight every time, but they do that by putting you on a scale and reading it off.] The fact that my height wasn't being remeasured didn't bother them; I'm not sure what that question is for.)

fullstop 5mo ago
You're very much over thinking this. That's the first question every doctor asks a woman, and legitimate problems are often overlooked because of it.
kaikai 5mo ago
I’m a normal weight, and get asked the same question. More importantly, I can tell them, “I have a regular cycle” and they WILL NOT take that as an answer. I HAVE to give them a date, and they will ask me to make one up if I can’t remember or want to decline giving them that information. Particularly given the alarming stories of people being prosecuted for having miscarriages, it feels ridiculous. If anything I hope more automated diagnostics and triage could help women and POC get better care, but only if there’s safeguards against prejudice. There’s studies showing different rates of pain management across races and sexes, for example. A broken bone is a broken bone, regardless of sex or race.
- thaumasiotes 5mo ago
  > and they will ask me to make one up if I can’t remember or want to decline giving them that information Doesn't this suggest that they don't care what the answer is?
  - rrr_oh_man 5mo ago
    It sounds like a form to be filled out…
  - kaikai 5mo ago
    They, as an individual healthcare provider, don’t care. The system will not allow them to ignore it, though, so the system cares very much.
    - thaumasiotes 5mo ago
      OK. What is this fact supposed to teach us?

codewench 5mo ago

Yes? That's a very important piece of information, and I hope would be a thing a doctor asks, especially if there are concerns about weight or nutrition.

fullstop 5mo ago
She's not there about her weight, though. I highly encourage you to talk to women about their experiences here. The weight thing was not the key aspect of my original comment. They chastised my wife for continuing to give my daughter whole milk while being underweight, but did not make similar comments to me. That was the point. For women, their pains and problems are far too often whisked away by hand waving and "it's hormones and periods" and serious issues are often overlooked. Very little has changed in that area over the last twenty years.

tacticus 5mo ago

medical industry must be going for some long term achievement in how much they disbelieve, mistreat, and degrade women going to them. I wonder how many units of their training courses are spent on this and how much is spent on the cultural reinforcement of it.

fullstop 5mo ago
Yes, let's pretend that the bias does not exist, that is helpful. It certainly doesn't have to do with the fact that it's currently a 60/40 split in active male vs female physicians. Or that women are more likely to be taken seriously by doctors: * https://www.health.harvard.edu/pain/the-dangerous-dismissal-of-womens-pain * https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC10937548/ Are you really unwilling to admit that such a bias exists?
- heartbreak 5mo ago
  This seems like an especially bad faith interpretation of the comment you were responding to.

fn-mote 5mo ago

My experiences broadly support your conclusions. However, your argument focuses on the routine intake instead of any listening part. The fact that the doctor measures height, weight, temperature, and blood pressure on intake and then asks about LMP doesn’t surprise me… that’s the part of the script where you just provide the data before you bring up concerns. Not to say the doctor was not a jerk, just that your argument doesn’t do much for me.

kortilla 5mo ago

Why would they suggest switching to a lower fat percentage milk?

bmicraft 5mo ago
My dumb answer would be that less fat means more sugar per kcal, so less satiety per kcal. No idea if that's correct.
- pixel_popping 5mo ago
  Incorrect, not all products that reduce fat necessarily increases carb/sugar content.
  - bmicraft 5mo ago
    Wrong. If you just take out the fat you've necessarily got more of everything else per kcal. I didn't say per volume, I said per kcal.