4 ms·
Millennials delenda est. Or maybe Gen X. But definitely millennials. I am stockpiling champagne for when performative profanity goes to the grave with the silen
by zjp 7mo ago
Millennials delenda est. Or maybe Gen X. But definitely millennials. I am stockpiling champagne for when performative profanity goes to the grave with the silent generation against which it is still rebelling 70 years later. I do not want to order the sloppy toppy burger at BURGERSLUT. Just give me a cheeseburger. But yes, you should build a website.
- typon 7mo agoYou will be forced to watch Firefly for eternity. Millenials will rule the internet for a 1000 years (a millenia).
- replooda 7mo ago"Millenniales delendi sunt." Now, write it out a hundred times. If it's not done by sunrise...
- deleted 7mo ago[deleted]
- dickiedyce 7mo agoI daren’t ask “What have Millennials ever done for us?” because I have a suspicion that it would be a surprisingly unfunny answer.
- techterrier 7mo agothey gave us doggo
- zjp 7mo agoCheems will be to millennials what the Grateful Dead logo was to Boomers.
- achenet 7mo agoGoogle and Facebook? Minecraft? Most recent music?
- 0_____0 7mo agolooks up latin conjugation chart fuck this i'll learn mandarin instead
- replooda 7mo agohttps://inv.nadeko.net/watch?v=9jtiw721RAg https://inv.nadeko.net/watch?v=9jtiw721RAg
- 0_____0 7mo agoThanks, I was actually trying to find this the other day. By trying, I mean I thought about it but wasn't near my phone so I forgot to do it.
- _verandaguy 7mo agoIt's not the conjugations that scare most people, it's the declensions (ok, well, at least anglophones).
- jrflowers 7mo ago> I do not want to order the sloppy toppy burger at BURGERSLUT. Just give me a cheeseburger. Seems odd to complain about the kitschy menu item names after walking into BURGERSLUT intent on ordering
- zjp 7mo agoYou don’t always get to choose the restaurant. Sometimes your friends drag you places. Sometimes your sister in law wants to go take a photo of the Castro Theater and then get a cookie, and you find yourself in Hot Cookie calling a chocolate chip a Basic Bitch. I just think that these kinds of "perfect agency" gotchas ignore the tradeoffs of living an actual life.
- jrflowers 7mo agoWhat is the tradeoff in the scenario you described? You were enjoying time with your sister in law, you called a cookie a bitch, and then…? You weren’t having fun with your sister in law after that?
- zjp 7mo agoI think the cost of having to say something humiliating is at least equal to the cost of the cookie, so I want it for free. Of course I had fun with my sister in law, even if I rolled my eyes at the business. That's beside the point. Making you say this stuff is a tiny, petty act of domination. Say it or you don't get the cookie, or you look unfun. Anyway, it's the same argument people have been having forever about not wanting to say 'grande' at Starbucks. A war we won. And we will win this one.
- chillfox 7mo agopointing at the menu and saying "that one" works just fine.
- jrflowers 7mo agoDo your friends and family know that calling a cookie a bitch is humiliating to you? That’s a pretty strong feeling, so I would be pretty mad if I communicated that and people close to me still dragged me to those places anyway. I wouldn’t be mad at the business, though, I’d be mad at the people that are knowingly disrespecting my boundaries.
- Apocryphon 7mo agoIronically, this kind of performative outrage (over a performative thing or not) is also very Gen X or millennial-coded. I can’t even. Take a chill pill.
- zjp 7mo agoNo.
- Apocryphon 7mo agoYou’re so Julia
- PaulDavisThe1st 7mo ago> is also very Gen X or millennial-coded. I can’t even. irony, much?
- Apocryphon 7mo agoDon’t have a cow, man
- tryauuum 7mo agowhat is a "performative profanity"? A profanity which only goal is to be performed, said out loud? What other goals does a profanity have? I guess to hurt feelings of another person?
- zjp 7mo agoFucking performative fucking profanity is fucking gratuitous and is fucking clearly only fucking there so you fucking know I fucking smoke fucking Camel Lights. It’s not fucking musical. It doesn’t fucking enhance the fucking thought or it’s the wrong fucking emotional fucking register for the fucking material. It’s just fucking there.
- pickleglitch 7mo agoIronic that the original post is not actually written like this.
- rchaud 7mo agoBasically to get the attention of others and distinguish oneself from the stiff formality of previous generations. It's a very common trope in the titles of self-help books written by millennials: https://www.reddit.com/r/starterpacks/comments/ceecki/book_titles_in_2019_starterpack/ https://www.reddit.com/r/starterpacks/comments/ceecki/book_t...
- bix6 7mo agoWell all the assets are with the old asses so the only thing left for the younger gens is creativity and humor. I’d make you eat a sloppy toppy burger too you little burger slut boomer bitch <3
- zjp 7mo agoThis is clever but it’s self defeating because it’s tasteful. It’s a good joke. I felt like John Waters was saying it to me. And the painful thing to me is the tastelessness.
- gamerdonkey 7mo agoWhat do you want the title to be? "Have a Website"? No, that's missing the emphasis. "I Strongly Encourage Businesses to Have a Website"? There we go. That sounds bland enough to be regurgitated by your LLM of the week. Enjoy your war on adjectives, I guess. It's certainly going to make the world more interesting. Jesus fucking christ.
- zjp 7mo ago'Fuck' is every part of speech simultaneously because it doesn't mean anything. I just want it to be clever and load bearing. Back to the food lens: like an ice cream shop called Daddy's Ice Cream, stylized as Daddy's [Ice] Cream, a name that would recast even "Vanilla", selling a flavor called "Chocolate Paint". You have to work to figure it out. Is it a non sequitur, a Valentine's Day tradition, or a failure of prep? It doesn't force you to be the straight man in a bit. You have an out. The words are literally clean. It's not 'ha, I am about to sexually submit to my food, and eating is a blowjob'.
- GreenWatermelon 7mo agoIt could be "Please, I beg of you, have a website" or "For the love of God, have a website" or even "AAAHHHHH JUST HAVE A WEBSITE ALREADY" Many ways exist to cover all ranges of emotions without resorting to a purely cosmetic "fuck"
- dqv 7mo agocringe >>> performative blandness have a fkin boring substack, write abt your car (whimsy typo, not cringe like "doggo")
- alsetmusic 7mo ago> performative profanity While I'm perfectly capable of writing professionally, I have a mouth like a sailor when I'm speaking with people who are close to me. I sometimes choose to write the way I speak and I appreciate when others do so as well, assuming it comes off as genuine. I think this person cares that much and wanted to convey their frustration. It worked for me. I thought it was excellent.