For a substantiative account of how to proceed when these issues arise, see the Harvard Negotiation Project's book "Difficult Conversations". Their thesis in a

For a substantiative account of how to proceed when these issues arise, see the Harvard Negotiation Project's book "Difficult Conversations". Their thesis in a nutshell is that difficult conversations are made up of three simultaneous conversations: The Facts conversation, the Feelings conversation, and the Identity conversation. They give advice based on that framework.