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I agree with the broader message. Especially on vacation, disconnecting is important; it lets you take in life and experience it untethered, away from work ema

I agree with the broader message. Especially on vacation, disconnecting is important; it lets you take in life and experience it untethered, away from work email or other daily concerns. And if Facebook and other social networks make you feel that way, you certainly should disconnect from them. But I wanted to call out a couple of things: I woke up yesterday morning to a few Facebook status updates from people who don’t like Halloween, and who would never let their kids participate in the evils of trick-or-treating. I was immediately filled with guilt because I allowed my daughter to enjoy herself so much the previous night by letting her dress up in her self-chosen mermaid/fairy combination. Why on earth would you feel guilty because you let your daughter go trick or treating and she had a great time? And then I realized that I feel like that all the time on Facebook. Guilt, anger, envy… Those are the emotions that fuel all social networks, but perhaps Facebook more than the others. They’re the emotions that make us share/like/comment on things. I don't really use Facebook that often, but when I do it's to look at photos someone uploaded or read a funny comment someone left. So I guess I disagree that guilt, anger, and envy fuel all social networks (exclusively, which is what this seems to imply). It's a really strange worldview to me. Really, it sounds like you just know a lot of unpleasant people.

jusben1369 14y ago
I think you guys are missing a very key point. Without Facebook there was no way you were bombarded with this information. You just didn't see it or think about it. The perfect example is the current Presidential election. People I've known for 10 years are kind of shocking me with their political points of view and changing how I feel about them. Pre Facebook that just wouldn't happen. Now, how you react to these events is about you (the guilt/anger/jealous/bemused) However, it's important to acknowledge that FB and SN's in general greatly intensify the amount of this type of communication than before. Maybe if you're under 25 there isn't a real "before" to compare it to though perhaps.
k-mcgrady 14y ago
>> "Really, it sounds like you just know a lot of unpleasant people." Feeling guilt, anger, and envy reading a social network sounds like a personal problem and not entirely the fault of the people posting updates.
- mccolin 14y ago
  I agree. If social networks invoke those negative feelings within a person, it definitely indicates something that person has to deal with. I'm sure there are people driven by these emotions, but have hopes that friends and family are sharing to share and liking because they like things, not merely to keep score.
  - luos 14y ago
    "it definitely indicates something that person has to deal with" I don't agree. On facebook you see idealized lives of others and it can be pretty depressing. You see others going on vacation but you don't see them fighting with relatives ( ok, I see that, it just annoys me) and you can start thinking that their lives are better than yours. I don't know if this is an accurate source, but I think this can be a problem for not so (mentally) stable people: (They could suffer from this without facebook too, but the dose on facebook is much bigger than in a close friend circle.) http://www.uvm.edu/~pdodds/files/papers/others/2011/moreno2011a.pdf http://www.uvm.edu/~pdodds/files/papers/others/2011/moreno20... - FEELING BAD ON FACEBOOK: DEPRESSION DISCLOSURES BY COLLEGE STUDENTS ON A SOCIAL NETWORKING SITE
    - omarrr 14y ago
      > On facebook you see idealized lives of others and it can be pretty depressing. I'm very sorry that you feel this way, but if you feel depressed for other peoples idealized lives, you have a problem that has nothing to do with your friends or Facebook.
- hkmurakami 14y ago
  I tend to agree that such feelings are rooted in personal issues. However I think it's also true that Facebook status updates can act as a catalyst for making those feelings bubble up in someone, when that person is trying to live their own lives without being reminded of "what could have been" etc.
  - ChuckMcM 14y ago
Swizec 14y ago
We need to stop thinking of social networks as anything other than "social interaction". If a person feels guilt, anger, envy etc. when others tell them their opinion, they will feel so regardless of the medium on which the message was delivered. But it's much easier to blame social networks than fixing one's own attitude. (similar to how people would prefer to ban good television than teach their children about the difference between acted and real violence ... or the whole boobies thing)
- nonrecursive 14y ago
  I don't think he was ever blaming the people he's connected to on Facebook. He never indicated that the people were even directing their posts at him. I actually think it was a mature thing for him to do. He noticed that one of his behaviors - going online and looking at Facebook - had a negative effect on him, so he decided not to engage in the behavior as much. When you say, "If a person feels guilt, anger, envy etc. when others tell them their opinion, they will feel so regardless of the medium on which the message was delivered." - this may be true. But. Facebook (and twitter and other social networks) allow people to broadcast their opinions in a way that wasn't usual for most people before. Most people are more likely to be reserved or show some tact about expressing their opinions when they're engaged in conversation than they are when broadcasting online. edit: sorry - Swizec didn't say he the author was blaming people. I got his comment mixed up with another one. In any case, I didn't think he was blaming social media insofar as he's taking responsibility by changing his behavior.
  - benihana 14y ago
    >I don't think he was ever blaming the people he's connected to on Facebook. Swizec never said he blamed people. Swizec (correctly) said he blamed the social networks.
- grego 14y ago
  But social networks provide a sensory overload that was not there before. Go back some years to time without even sms, and you would get other peoples opinion practically only when you saw them. I'm sure there are many personality types even today who dislike facebook like interaction, and that's fine. Certainly that is not an attitude that requires fixing.
itsnotme 14y ago
> But I wanted to call out > Why on earth would you > Really, it sounds like you just You don't come off very nice.
tanov2 14y ago
> But I wanted to call out > Why on earth would you > Really, it sounds like you just You sound like an ass.

jusben1369 14y ago

I think you guys are missing a very key point. Without Facebook there was no way you were bombarded with this information. You just didn't see it or think about it. The perfect example is the current Presidential election. People I've known for 10 years are kind of shocking me with their political points of view and changing how I feel about them. Pre Facebook that just wouldn't happen. Now, how you react to these events is about you (the guilt/anger/jealous/bemused) However, it's important to acknowledge that FB and SN's in general greatly intensify the amount of this type of communication than before. Maybe if you're under 25 there isn't a real "before" to compare it to though perhaps.

k-mcgrady 14y ago

>> "Really, it sounds like you just know a lot of unpleasant people." Feeling guilt, anger, and envy reading a social network sounds like a personal problem and not entirely the fault of the people posting updates.

mccolin 14y ago
I agree. If social networks invoke those negative feelings within a person, it definitely indicates something that person has to deal with. I'm sure there are people driven by these emotions, but have hopes that friends and family are sharing to share and liking because they like things, not merely to keep score.
- luos 14y ago
  "it definitely indicates something that person has to deal with" I don't agree. On facebook you see idealized lives of others and it can be pretty depressing. You see others going on vacation but you don't see them fighting with relatives ( ok, I see that, it just annoys me) and you can start thinking that their lives are better than yours. I don't know if this is an accurate source, but I think this can be a problem for not so (mentally) stable people: (They could suffer from this without facebook too, but the dose on facebook is much bigger than in a close friend circle.) http://www.uvm.edu/~pdodds/files/papers/others/2011/moreno2011a.pdf http://www.uvm.edu/~pdodds/files/papers/others/2011/moreno20... - FEELING BAD ON FACEBOOK: DEPRESSION DISCLOSURES BY COLLEGE STUDENTS ON A SOCIAL NETWORKING SITE
  - omarrr 14y ago
    > On facebook you see idealized lives of others and it can be pretty depressing. I'm very sorry that you feel this way, but if you feel depressed for other peoples idealized lives, you have a problem that has nothing to do with your friends or Facebook.
hkmurakami 14y ago
I tend to agree that such feelings are rooted in personal issues. However I think it's also true that Facebook status updates can act as a catalyst for making those feelings bubble up in someone, when that person is trying to live their own lives without being reminded of "what could have been" etc.
- ChuckMcM 14y ago

Swizec 14y ago

We need to stop thinking of social networks as anything other than "social interaction". If a person feels guilt, anger, envy etc. when others tell them their opinion, they will feel so regardless of the medium on which the message was delivered. But it's much easier to blame social networks than fixing one's own attitude. (similar to how people would prefer to ban good television than teach their children about the difference between acted and real violence ... or the whole boobies thing)

nonrecursive 14y ago
I don't think he was ever blaming the people he's connected to on Facebook. He never indicated that the people were even directing their posts at him. I actually think it was a mature thing for him to do. He noticed that one of his behaviors - going online and looking at Facebook - had a negative effect on him, so he decided not to engage in the behavior as much. When you say, "If a person feels guilt, anger, envy etc. when others tell them their opinion, they will feel so regardless of the medium on which the message was delivered." - this may be true. But. Facebook (and twitter and other social networks) allow people to broadcast their opinions in a way that wasn't usual for most people before. Most people are more likely to be reserved or show some tact about expressing their opinions when they're engaged in conversation than they are when broadcasting online. edit: sorry - Swizec didn't say he the author was blaming people. I got his comment mixed up with another one. In any case, I didn't think he was blaming social media insofar as he's taking responsibility by changing his behavior.
- benihana 14y ago
  >I don't think he was ever blaming the people he's connected to on Facebook. Swizec never said he blamed people. Swizec (correctly) said he blamed the social networks.
grego 14y ago
But social networks provide a sensory overload that was not there before. Go back some years to time without even sms, and you would get other peoples opinion practically only when you saw them. I'm sure there are many personality types even today who dislike facebook like interaction, and that's fine. Certainly that is not an attitude that requires fixing.

itsnotme 14y ago

> But I wanted to call out > Why on earth would you > Really, it sounds like you just You don't come off very nice.

tanov2 14y ago

> But I wanted to call out > Why on earth would you > Really, it sounds like you just You sound like an ass.