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>"Somewhere along the way, too many of us learned to sand off our weird edges, to preemptively remove anything that might make someone uncomfortable or make us
by ramesh31 8mo ago
>"Somewhere along the way, too many of us learned to sand off our weird edges, to preemptively remove anything that might make someone uncomfortable or make us seem difficult to be around."
As an adult you learn that showing your true self can be dangerous in an environment where you don't know who can be trusted. We don't get the allowance of children to be weird or awkward. Others are gunning for us, and looking for any possible weakness. One wrong impression can drastically affect your life. So you curate yourself in a way that keeps your personality for those who can be trusted to accept and understand it, and others may see that as boring until they've been let in. It's just maturity; you have to earn the right to have me let my guard down around you.
- epolanski 8mo agoDangerous how? You can simply...not care. Unless it's a context with a minimum required codex such as work. But in your relationships, if you want to have meaningful ones, you need to find those where you can be yourself. It's better to have 1 or 2 true friends (hell, most people don't have that many, you're lucky if you do) than knowing and being popular among dozens for a filtered/fake persona you built so others like you.
- bandofthehawk 8mo agoDoesn't almost every situation have a minimum required codex? Sure, you should be yourself with your friends. But if they are already your friends, then you are likely already interesting enough. I thought the article was more about how to be interesting to people who don't already know you.
- bandofthehawk 8mo agoWell said, this was similar to what I was thinking while reading this. Acting in a completely unfiltered way can get you into fights, arrested, or worse.