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Read more, like biographies and good fiction. Meditate and see into yourself. Understanding minds is a skill like any other, and gets better with practice.

• wat10000 9mo ago
  There's understanding, and there's understanding. I think I'm pretty decent at understanding people these days, as in predicting how they'll react to things, figuring out what they want, that sort of thing. But I don't understand it on a fundamental level, the way I understand something like math. I have a decent grasp of the game, but I don't understand why the rules of the game are what they are. I get the impression this is how a lot of people feel about math, or computers. They know you can compute a 20% tip by sliding the decimal point over and doubling, but it's just a procedure they follow, they don't understand it. I've read and thought and interacted plenty. This has built up the skill just fine, but the fundamental understanding is something I don't think will ever come.
  • Herring 9mo ago
    And I’m telling you that’s not a rare sentiment. I do a lot of zen, and one famous teacher talks about feeling disconnected from people for a long time. I’m not saying you have to do anything, it’s your life, but just don’t assume it’s something unique or permanent.
    • wat10000 9mo ago
      I don't think it's unique, but it doesn't seem to be the norm. Most people seem to just accept how people behave without thinking about it too much. When they respond to "how are you?" used as a greeting, they just do it, they're not calculating the right answer. As far as permanence goes, I'm probably more than halfway through my lifespan at this point and there's no sign of any improvement there. Like I said, as a skill I do just fine. But that deeper understanding isn't there and I doubt it will be.