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> only questioned why he would have brought kids into the "union" For a lot of people, building a family is a duty you embrace with your household partner. It'

> only questioned why he would have brought kids into the "union" For a lot of people, building a family is a duty you embrace with your household partner. It's why you exist in the first place. It's why you get married and share a home with somebody at all. Perhaps, if you're lucky, your children are a fruit of love, or perhaps, if you're horny, they're a fruit of passion. But for a lot for such people, having and raising kids is the entirety of why you get married, and is the rationale for you might not marry for love or passion in the first place. Marrying the person you're most attracted to or have the most fun with or whose pants you're most eager to get into is a very culturally specific practice and frankly, even where it is an aspiration, its one that a lot of people just don't luck into. But they nonetheless feel an obligation, and even desire, to form and raise a family anyway, and so they march ahead and get it done, hopefully with somebody that they respect as a partner and who reciprocates the same.

sallveburrpi 11mo ago
I don’t exist to produce children, tbh a very narrow view of what life can be.
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- swatcoder 11mo ago
  That's great. Indeed, many of us don't see ourselves existing for that reason, especially among people who read and post on this site. But many many many in the world do see it that way, and more even in the past -- when the "dad" would have been making life their life choices -- than do right now. Either partially, but significantly, or wholly. My comment was helping its parent recognize the influence of that way of seeing the world, as it seemed to have escaped them.
  - mettamage 11mo ago
    Yea, solid take. > Marrying the person you're most attracted to or have the most fun with or whose pants you're most eager to get into is a very culturally specific practice and frankly, even where it is an aspiration, its one that a lot of people just don't luck into. Man, I feel this. And it's also funny that you write it in such an objective way but it's true. It _is_ a very culturaly specific practice. I've lucked into it. It feels amazing. But I'm lucky that I was crazy enough to really teach myself how to get over rejection and just search for as long as needed to find someone who felt the same way about me as I felt about her. Amazing character building though, it was a true rite of passage for me that started around when I was 16 and ended when I was 32 and married. Dating and being good at it, in order to be in an amazing relationship, has been an obsession of my life. This was in part because I sucked so hard at it as a young teenager. I think in earlier times I'd have settled for someone unappealing or stayed a virgin. Thank god, the internet was a thing when I was young.
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- Forgeties79 11mo ago
  >For a lot of people,

sallveburrpi 11mo ago

I don’t exist to produce children, tbh a very narrow view of what life can be.

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swatcoder 11mo ago
That's great. Indeed, many of us don't see ourselves existing for that reason, especially among people who read and post on this site. But many many many in the world do see it that way, and more even in the past -- when the "dad" would have been making life their life choices -- than do right now. Either partially, but significantly, or wholly. My comment was helping its parent recognize the influence of that way of seeing the world, as it seemed to have escaped them.
- mettamage 11mo ago
  Yea, solid take. > Marrying the person you're most attracted to or have the most fun with or whose pants you're most eager to get into is a very culturally specific practice and frankly, even where it is an aspiration, its one that a lot of people just don't luck into. Man, I feel this. And it's also funny that you write it in such an objective way but it's true. It _is_ a very culturaly specific practice. I've lucked into it. It feels amazing. But I'm lucky that I was crazy enough to really teach myself how to get over rejection and just search for as long as needed to find someone who felt the same way about me as I felt about her. Amazing character building though, it was a true rite of passage for me that started around when I was 16 and ended when I was 32 and married. Dating and being good at it, in order to be in an amazing relationship, has been an obsession of my life. This was in part because I sucked so hard at it as a young teenager. I think in earlier times I'd have settled for someone unappealing or stayed a virgin. Thank god, the internet was a thing when I was young.
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Forgeties79 11mo ago
>For a lot of people,