5 ms·

Casual sex is misogynist? You should take a good look in the mirror, mister.

yters 18y ago
It is. Men can sleep around without ill effect, but it destroys a woman emotionally. Women need the security of social stigma against cads. So, tricking women to think casual sex is good is misogynistic since it is all about using women. Certain aspects of feminism look like they were actually invented by very evil men.
- menloparkbum 18y ago
  Men can sleep around without ill effect? Tell that to my chlamydia infection. Ba-da-bing! Seriously though, your observation is totally cultural and most certainly doesn't apply in the Bay Area. There's no real stigma against casual sex here and since there is a 10:1 male to female ratio, the women are totally in control. Women here have the luxury of figuring out exactly what combination of dick size, personality, paycheck and hairdo they like. The men, rather than being predatory cads, are reduced to fretting over whether or not they should get a tattoo or an $80 t-shirt in hopes of maybe possibly (probably not) attracting the attention of a google PM.
  - time_management 18y ago
    Remind me not to move to the Bay Area unless I have a girlfriend at the time. Sex and the City bitches are disgusting. I hate to admit this, but I take pleasure in the thought of them spending their middle-aged years sobbing every time a school bus passes by.
    - anamax 18y ago
      > I hate to admit this, but I take pleasure in the thought of them spending their middle-aged years sobbing every time a school bus passes by. Someone needs a double-helping of "It's not about you." Your cocoon may work for you, but its not reality. There's nothing wrong with being a judgemental prick, but it doesn't work well with "I'm just good-hearted and caring".
    - anamax 18y ago
      Now I remember where I saw this attitude before. "I still do look down, reflexively, upon any "profession" connected to real estate. I can honestly say I'd never marry a woman who worked in RE, and only a woman from a real estate family if she had been purified through an elite college, a filter I otherwise don't care about in the slightest."
  - plinkplonk 18y ago
    "attracting the attention of a google PM" I am sure I'm missing some cultural nuance here((Though I've lived in the USA, I've been in INdia for the last 6 years). Are Google PMs very attractive in general?
- time_management 18y ago
  Men can sleep around without ill effect, but it destroys a woman emotionally. It destroys a lot of men emotionally, as well. It's just not healthy for anyone. The detached "alpha male" is an anachronism in civilized society, and the terms for those with strong alpha tendencies are "psychopath", "narcissist", and (for women) "nymphomaniac". Psychopaths (of both genders) can do it without emotional harm to themselves, and there's a much wider pool of people who are in denial about the emotional consequences... but the rest of us aren't built for that type of "relationship". So, in truth, there are people who can have casual sex without being "destroyed", but they're rare and usually not very likeable. Most men I know who have had one-night stands regret them. The broader issue with casual sex has nothing to do with the immediate emotional effects, but with the long-term consequences. It establishes bad emotional and physical habits, but it also makes people less desirable as marriage partners, and most people want the option, at least, to get settle down and get married one day. Most people are fine with "premarital" sex, given that we're a generation that tends to marry very late, but casual sex is an unspoken divide among young people today. We have about 40% of the population-- a relatively stable proportion across levels of socioeconomic status and education-- going off and doing this in their teens and 20s, expecting there to be no consequences because birth control "solved that". (Riiight.) Then we have a "silent majority" of about 60% who have never had casual sex, see no reason to respect it, and consider such experiences distasteful and extremely undesirable in future marriage partners. My observation is that nearly all of the marriageable women are in the latter category, and that men who have lots of casual sex in their 20s end up settling down with second-rate women when they're looking to get married. True ladies don't want to have anything to do with them. (Sorry, but it has to be said.) These are the later-in-life consequences for men who have casual sex; for women, they're probably worse.
  - anamax 18y ago
    > True ladies don't want to have anything to do with them. Keep telling yourself that. > (Sorry, but it has to be said.) You're not sorry at all. You have to say it so other people can see your superiority. Plus, you like saying it. > the terms for those with strong alpha tendencies are "psychopath", "narcissist", and (for women) "nymphomaniac" Wowsers.

yters 18y ago

It is. Men can sleep around without ill effect, but it destroys a woman emotionally. Women need the security of social stigma against cads. So, tricking women to think casual sex is good is misogynistic since it is all about using women. Certain aspects of feminism look like they were actually invented by very evil men.

menloparkbum 18y ago
Men can sleep around without ill effect? Tell that to my chlamydia infection. Ba-da-bing! Seriously though, your observation is totally cultural and most certainly doesn't apply in the Bay Area. There's no real stigma against casual sex here and since there is a 10:1 male to female ratio, the women are totally in control. Women here have the luxury of figuring out exactly what combination of dick size, personality, paycheck and hairdo they like. The men, rather than being predatory cads, are reduced to fretting over whether or not they should get a tattoo or an $80 t-shirt in hopes of maybe possibly (probably not) attracting the attention of a google PM.
- time_management 18y ago
  Remind me not to move to the Bay Area unless I have a girlfriend at the time. Sex and the City bitches are disgusting. I hate to admit this, but I take pleasure in the thought of them spending their middle-aged years sobbing every time a school bus passes by.
  - anamax 18y ago
    > I hate to admit this, but I take pleasure in the thought of them spending their middle-aged years sobbing every time a school bus passes by. Someone needs a double-helping of "It's not about you." Your cocoon may work for you, but its not reality. There's nothing wrong with being a judgemental prick, but it doesn't work well with "I'm just good-hearted and caring".
  - anamax 18y ago
    Now I remember where I saw this attitude before. "I still do look down, reflexively, upon any "profession" connected to real estate. I can honestly say I'd never marry a woman who worked in RE, and only a woman from a real estate family if she had been purified through an elite college, a filter I otherwise don't care about in the slightest."
- plinkplonk 18y ago
  "attracting the attention of a google PM" I am sure I'm missing some cultural nuance here((Though I've lived in the USA, I've been in INdia for the last 6 years). Are Google PMs very attractive in general?
time_management 18y ago
Men can sleep around without ill effect, but it destroys a woman emotionally. It destroys a lot of men emotionally, as well. It's just not healthy for anyone. The detached "alpha male" is an anachronism in civilized society, and the terms for those with strong alpha tendencies are "psychopath", "narcissist", and (for women) "nymphomaniac". Psychopaths (of both genders) can do it without emotional harm to themselves, and there's a much wider pool of people who are in denial about the emotional consequences... but the rest of us aren't built for that type of "relationship". So, in truth, there are people who can have casual sex without being "destroyed", but they're rare and usually not very likeable. Most men I know who have had one-night stands regret them. The broader issue with casual sex has nothing to do with the immediate emotional effects, but with the long-term consequences. It establishes bad emotional and physical habits, but it also makes people less desirable as marriage partners, and most people want the option, at least, to get settle down and get married one day. Most people are fine with "premarital" sex, given that we're a generation that tends to marry very late, but casual sex is an unspoken divide among young people today. We have about 40% of the population-- a relatively stable proportion across levels of socioeconomic status and education-- going off and doing this in their teens and 20s, expecting there to be no consequences because birth control "solved that". (Riiight.) Then we have a "silent majority" of about 60% who have never had casual sex, see no reason to respect it, and consider such experiences distasteful and extremely undesirable in future marriage partners. My observation is that nearly all of the marriageable women are in the latter category, and that men who have lots of casual sex in their 20s end up settling down with second-rate women when they're looking to get married. True ladies don't want to have anything to do with them. (Sorry, but it has to be said.) These are the later-in-life consequences for men who have casual sex; for women, they're probably worse.
- anamax 18y ago
  > True ladies don't want to have anything to do with them. Keep telling yourself that. > (Sorry, but it has to be said.) You're not sorry at all. You have to say it so other people can see your superiority. Plus, you like saying it. > the terms for those with strong alpha tendencies are "psychopath", "narcissist", and (for women) "nymphomaniac" Wowsers.