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I assumed the question was how to achieve the proper preconditions for cooking a chicken while avoiding any animal cruelty charges. Clearly, we could simply kn
by Nevermark 1y ago
I assumed the question was how to achieve the proper preconditions for cooking a chicken while avoiding any animal cruelty charges.
Clearly, we could simply knock its head off with a bat, since today I learned you can physically cook chickens with bats and professional batters, via a method well suited to humanity's eminent migration to outer space.
But I expect with some years of strength training and finesse, a very hard flick to the back of the chicken's lower noggin could dislodge the first cervical vertebrate from the skull, severing the spinal cord's integration with the brain stem.
Whether actually dead, or merely in a persistent vegetative state, the chicken may now be cooked.
However, if the chicken is merely headless [0], but in good health, one should not cook it.
[0] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mike_the_Headless_Chicken https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mike_the_Headless_Chicken
- schwartzworld 1y agoWhen has anybody ever been charged for cooking a chicken?
- lcnPylGDnU4H9OF 1y ago> The charges were filed in April [2023] after police received reports that Prince Ssenteza-Woodson cooked a baby chicken in an air fryer while streaming it live on social media. https://www.wdrb.com/news/crime-reports/uofl-student-sentenced-for-animal-cruelty-after-streaming-himself-cooking-baby-chicken-alive/article_1afb34ce-2d3d-11ee-923f-8b915b30ab52.html https://www.wdrb.com/news/crime-reports/uofl-student-sentenc...
- BriggyDwiggs42 1y agoYeah that’s fucked up.
- notaurus 1y agoHonestly par for the course for human treatment of chickens. See chick culling [1]. Billions of baby chicks are macerated live because they are not commercially useful. > Worldwide: As of 2015, approximately 7 billion male chicks were culled annually around the world [1] https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chick_culling https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chick_culling
- AngryData 1y agoHard disagree. Burning something alive in a slow and agonizing death for zero purpose other than cruelty is nowhere near the same thing as near instantaneously killing an animal for animal husbandry purposes. Could we do better or have better practices? Sure. Is there an argument for not eating meat at all? Sure. But if you were going to die you would have a lot bigger problem being slowly roasted alive versus instant brain destruction.
- BriggyDwiggs42 1y agoThe life they give the chickens they don’t cull is almost certainly worse than death, at least in the typical factory farm.
- userbinator 1y agoThat tells me the police have nothing better to do.
- BriggyDwiggs42 1y agoFirst off, good. I’m glad crime is down. Second, let’s say we ignore the ethical part of what they did to the chicken. Their behavior still demonstrates serious mental issues that should get treatment before they negatively impact a person, right? Also, don’t ignore the ethical issues with fucking torturing a baby animal for no reason whatsoever.