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> They can see where I am, down to my address, at any given time. Why not? To avoid some awkward conversations many people would rather avoid, I guess? "You w

> They can see where I am, down to my address, at any given time. Why not? To avoid some awkward conversations many people would rather avoid, I guess? "You were nearby? Why didn't you attend blah/come say hi/etc.?" "You're here? Didn't you say you're going to be out of town?" "What were you out doing at {time/place}?" etc.

ohyoutravel 1y ago
I do the same thing, just smaller group. Answering the questions you’re asking just requires candor: I need some me time. I wasn’t feeling up to it. Will catch you next time.
- dataflow 1y ago
  > just requires candor: I need some me time. I wasn’t feeling up to it. Will catch you next time. Great! You tell them honestly, what could possibly go wrong. I'm sure nobody's feelings would be hurt when you tell them you weren't feeling like meeting them. Now next time you drop by and still don't manage to catch them for whatever reason. Now your prior "candor" becomes a lie -- one that never needed to arise in the first place. Maybe you enjoy getting yourself into these kinds of situations, but hopefully you can understand why others might not.
  - exe34 1y ago
    they might just have reasonable friends. I personally stopped putting up with people who annoy me in 2018 and I'm much better off for it.
  - medstrom 1y ago
    Most likely the GP who shares location with 30 people just doesn't get into these kinds of situations. Y'know, since they'd have stopped if they did.
AppleBananaPie 1y ago
A ton of people have mine and no one has ever given anyone shit about it. It's mostly just 'yooooo I didn't realize you were near X' or 'how was Y? I saw it when checking where my buddy was' Dunno maybe someone's has been messing with me all these years and I'm oblivious
- account42 1y ago
  Sounds incredibly creepy.
Fernicia 1y ago
If those risks outweigh the benefit of having an impromptu lunch with them, or the sonder comfort of seeing them enjoy a Friday night at home, then don't share your location with that person. If you feel that way about everyone, then you are a very different person to me (and probably OP).
- dataflow 1y ago
  > If those risks outweigh the benefit of having an impromptu lunch with them, or the sonder comfort of seeing them enjoy a Friday night at home, then don't share your location with that person. If you feel that way about everyone, then you are a very different person to me (and probably OP). If you feel these are the only two possibilities, we're definitely very different people.
zeroonetwothree 1y ago
Maybe if you don’t lie to people you wouldn’t have that issue?
- dataflow 1y ago
  > Maybe if you don’t lie to people you wouldn’t have that issue? The heck? Is it that hard for you to imagine these occurring without lying? You have X planned, and now your plans change to Y. Now you owe everyone whose invitation you'd declined an explanation, or they wonder if you're a liar. Or I guess if they're like you, they already assumed you're a liar.
  - AlecSchueler 1y ago
    But why is potentially explaining a change of plans such an issue?
    - iamnothere 1y ago
      Because having to keep track of who might have noticed you on the map—then explaining your choices to them—is draining and makes you feel like you can’t make a basic personal choice without justifying it. Because sometimes people can be unreasonable. (Bad day, drunk, generally difficult personality, etc.) The more people you add to your circle, the more you are likely to run into this. Because it’s none of their business. You are not owed my time just because I’m nearby. That’s not a healthy boundary to have. Location sharing encourages “boundary creep” that forces you to more frequently justify and reinforce your personal boundaries, adding friction to the relationship.
      - AlecSchueler 1y ago
        Then just don't? If it's none of their business then it's none of their business, if they're unreasonable then that's their problem, if you don't want to justify it then just don't?
        1y ago
fragmede 1y ago
The obvious one being your wife noticing you're at your mistress' house when you told her you were over at your girlfriend's, but outside of that, the problem the people that are positive about sharing their location is that it's also being abused by the abusive. That's a social problem, and not something technology can solve. I share my location with people I love and trust and will understand that I was busy and had an itinerary I needed to stick to and couldn't see them even though I was right next door, and if they ask we'll have a conversation about it that isn't awkward. Good for me but the problem isn't that I have good people in my life that I share this with, but that other people have bad people in their lives that they're forced to share it with, for whatever reason. I don't have an answer for that.

ohyoutravel 1y ago

I do the same thing, just smaller group. Answering the questions you’re asking just requires candor: I need some me time. I wasn’t feeling up to it. Will catch you next time.

dataflow 1y ago
> just requires candor: I need some me time. I wasn’t feeling up to it. Will catch you next time. Great! You tell them honestly, what could possibly go wrong. I'm sure nobody's feelings would be hurt when you tell them you weren't feeling like meeting them. Now next time you drop by and still don't manage to catch them for whatever reason. Now your prior "candor" becomes a lie -- one that never needed to arise in the first place. Maybe you enjoy getting yourself into these kinds of situations, but hopefully you can understand why others might not.
- exe34 1y ago
  they might just have reasonable friends. I personally stopped putting up with people who annoy me in 2018 and I'm much better off for it.
- medstrom 1y ago
  Most likely the GP who shares location with 30 people just doesn't get into these kinds of situations. Y'know, since they'd have stopped if they did.

AppleBananaPie 1y ago

A ton of people have mine and no one has ever given anyone shit about it. It's mostly just 'yooooo I didn't realize you were near X' or 'how was Y? I saw it when checking where my buddy was' Dunno maybe someone's has been messing with me all these years and I'm oblivious

account42 1y ago
Sounds incredibly creepy.

Fernicia 1y ago

If those risks outweigh the benefit of having an impromptu lunch with them, or the sonder comfort of seeing them enjoy a Friday night at home, then don't share your location with that person. If you feel that way about everyone, then you are a very different person to me (and probably OP).

dataflow 1y ago
> If those risks outweigh the benefit of having an impromptu lunch with them, or the sonder comfort of seeing them enjoy a Friday night at home, then don't share your location with that person. If you feel that way about everyone, then you are a very different person to me (and probably OP). If you feel these are the only two possibilities, we're definitely very different people.

zeroonetwothree 1y ago

Maybe if you don’t lie to people you wouldn’t have that issue?

dataflow 1y ago
> Maybe if you don’t lie to people you wouldn’t have that issue? The heck? Is it that hard for you to imagine these occurring without lying? You have X planned, and now your plans change to Y. Now you owe everyone whose invitation you'd declined an explanation, or they wonder if you're a liar. Or I guess if they're like you, they already assumed you're a liar.
- AlecSchueler 1y ago
  But why is potentially explaining a change of plans such an issue?
  - iamnothere 1y ago
    Because having to keep track of who might have noticed you on the map—then explaining your choices to them—is draining and makes you feel like you can’t make a basic personal choice without justifying it. Because sometimes people can be unreasonable. (Bad day, drunk, generally difficult personality, etc.) The more people you add to your circle, the more you are likely to run into this. Because it’s none of their business. You are not owed my time just because I’m nearby. That’s not a healthy boundary to have. Location sharing encourages “boundary creep” that forces you to more frequently justify and reinforce your personal boundaries, adding friction to the relationship.
    - AlecSchueler 1y ago
      Then just don't? If it's none of their business then it's none of their business, if they're unreasonable then that's their problem, if you don't want to justify it then just don't?
      - 1y ago

fragmede 1y ago

The obvious one being your wife noticing you're at your mistress' house when you told her you were over at your girlfriend's, but outside of that, the problem the people that are positive about sharing their location is that it's also being abused by the abusive. That's a social problem, and not something technology can solve. I share my location with people I love and trust and will understand that I was busy and had an itinerary I needed to stick to and couldn't see them even though I was right next door, and if they ask we'll have a conversation about it that isn't awkward. Good for me but the problem isn't that I have good people in my life that I share this with, but that other people have bad people in their lives that they're forced to share it with, for whatever reason. I don't have an answer for that.