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> some young people are so hopelessly immersed in the alternate reality that they see in social media that it's hard to shake them free. One of my favorite sta

> some young people are so hopelessly immersed in the alternate reality that they see in social media that it's hard to shake them free. One of my favorite staff/principal engineers always begins Monday's by asking people what they did on the weekend. He always talks about the things he did - farmers market, local parade, etc. It's shocking to many of the junior engineers. They generally do "nothing".

LtWorf 1y ago
They just don't want to tell you because they don't think it's your business.
- lexarflash8g 1y ago
  Anyone who thinks their boss/coworkers are their friend is surely deluded. There is no loyalty in this day and age-- both from the employer and employee side. Even asking "how was your weekend?" -- its implied that you just say good rather than sharing details of what you actually did -- they don't really care.
  - pyuser583 1y ago
    Even if you want the most cynical approach - networking is an essential aspect of career development. If you stick to just "job description during work hours" you won't get far. Building a cohesive team involves sharing interactions like this. If you truly value your privacy, I suggest you come up with an alternative thing to discuss: sports, weather, funny stories, etc. I've certainly had weekends where I very much did not want to share what i did, so I deflected in a way that kept the conversation going. If HR is asking about where you were at 3:15pm on Saturday, and who you were with, and whether you were using work resources at that time, I would start to worry. But a very large and generic, "so what did you do this weekend" - where you are in the driver's seat, that's not the same thing. When I look back at previous jobs, my strongest regrets are not building stronger interpersonal relationships with my coworkers. I've since rectified that. Think of it this way, if you must: coworker relationships are owned by the company - personal relationships are owned by the employees. When you become friends with a coworker, you acquire an asset that will go with you when you leave the company. Much like a new skill, this asset will allow you to get higher pay somewhere else.

LtWorf 1y ago

They just don't want to tell you because they don't think it's your business.

lexarflash8g 1y ago
Anyone who thinks their boss/coworkers are their friend is surely deluded. There is no loyalty in this day and age-- both from the employer and employee side. Even asking "how was your weekend?" -- its implied that you just say good rather than sharing details of what you actually did -- they don't really care.
- pyuser583 1y ago
  Even if you want the most cynical approach - networking is an essential aspect of career development. If you stick to just "job description during work hours" you won't get far. Building a cohesive team involves sharing interactions like this. If you truly value your privacy, I suggest you come up with an alternative thing to discuss: sports, weather, funny stories, etc. I've certainly had weekends where I very much did not want to share what i did, so I deflected in a way that kept the conversation going. If HR is asking about where you were at 3:15pm on Saturday, and who you were with, and whether you were using work resources at that time, I would start to worry. But a very large and generic, "so what did you do this weekend" - where you are in the driver's seat, that's not the same thing. When I look back at previous jobs, my strongest regrets are not building stronger interpersonal relationships with my coworkers. I've since rectified that. Think of it this way, if you must: coworker relationships are owned by the company - personal relationships are owned by the employees. When you become friends with a coworker, you acquire an asset that will go with you when you leave the company. Much like a new skill, this asset will allow you to get higher pay somewhere else.