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> normalizes hurting other people’s feelings with your word This is the Trammel problem: if you want a PvP-enabled project, you discover that people are mostly
by pjc50 1y ago
> normalizes hurting other people’s feelings with your word
This is the Trammel problem: if you want a PvP-enabled project, you discover that people are mostly interested in the part where they hurt others feelings and then go bananas when their own feelings are hurt.
> needs to be a system for accepting and expelling people
The private member's club is an old institution. But people tend to notice and object when it ends up being white guys only.
- satisfice 1y agoI guess you are having a problem reading what I wrote. Maybe you are reading someone else’s message and accidentally replied to mine. I said that a community must be a place where every member’s feelings matter. My feelings matter. Your feelings matter. But that doesn’t mean you can’t say things that annoy me (which you just did and I bet you don’t regret it). You can say hurtful things as long as you are acting in good faith— saying what you believe is true and helpful. You might think you are disagreeing with me. Nevertheless, you are demonstrating part of what I’m talking about: social life is unsmoothable without draining it of meaning and impact. Let’s instead develop resilience.