I totally understand what you meant-- definitely, anyone reading that comment had a chance to avoid this. But "you deserve it" is very harsh language for what i

I totally understand what you meant-- definitely, anyone reading that comment had a chance to avoid this. But "you deserve it" is very harsh language for what is for the vast majority a well-intentioned mistake at worst. So, no more shame, but just consider that it is possible to be sympathetic towards someone without endorsing their behavior.