5 ms·

I remember saying something on Facebook that wasn’t even that inflammatory but had a curse word and my grandma messaged me telling me to delete it. Instead I bl

by wincy 1y ago

I remember saying something on Facebook that wasn’t even that inflammatory but had a curse word and my grandma messaged me telling me to delete it. Instead I blocked grandma. Much happier just seeing grandma at holiday gatherings. I don’t think she even noticed honestly.

saghm 1y ago
> I don’t think she even noticed honestly. From her perspective, the post disappeared, and then you never posted anything like that again! Everyone wins
ChrisMarshallNY 1y ago
I had a relative threaten his daughter, because her daughter-in-law posted some political stuff he disagreed with. Basically, he had been helping her out financially, and pulled it, because she refused to sanction her daughter-in-law on his behalf.
- coldtea 1y ago
  This goes both ways (old to young and reverse), but family goes before politics. You don't cut out, or disown, or stop visiting, or badmouth family because you disagree with their politics... If you do so, you were a shitty relative to begin with.
  - generj 1y ago
    It depends, if the political take is sufficiently shitty it’s a betrayal of your morals, friends etc to continue to associate with your family spouting it. Typically that has to be some extreme form of bigotry people won’t let go of after repeated coaching. Extreme bigotry or conspiracy thinking is arguably a form of abuse directed at other family members and it’s 100% ok to cut people off for being abusive.
  - Ar-Curunir 1y ago
    Where does it stop? What if your relatives support, eg, racist policies? What if they support genocide? How personal does it have to be? What if you’re dating a person of another race, and your relatives support keeps making racist comments to you, even after you try to explain why that’s not okay?
    - coldtea 1y ago
      >Where does it stop? What if your relatives support, eg, racist policies? What if they support genocide? How personal does it have to be? Unless they act on them, they can support anything they like, it means less than them supporting some team or MCU fandom
      - Ar-Curunir 1y ago
        What? Your relative Being a racist is less important to you than them supporting the opposing team?
        deleted 1y ago
        [deleted]
  - stouset 1y ago
    No, sorry. Nazi family members come last. Family members with no respect for the rights and freedoms of others and who encourage and support inhumane treatment of others don’t get a free pass.
    - coldtea 1y ago
      Unless your family members are card carrying members of the Nazi party, "Nazi" is just a codeword for "disagree with them" just as "no respect for the rights and freedoms of others" is the same.
      - gruturo 1y ago
        That is either a very naive take, or a dishonest one. You don't need an actual nazi party issuing member cards to recognize someone strongly aligned with the values, opinion and realities of the WW2 (and previous decade) nazi party as such. By all means keep trolling or worse if it makes your day, hide behind pedantry if it's any help, but you're fooling very, very few people.
      - stouset 1y ago
        Sorry, but absolutely the fuck not. If someone votes for and cheers on the sending of specific ethnic groups to concentration camps, the removal of rights and freedoms for political opponents, and the advancement of authoritarianism, they are Nazis. We are way beyond Godwin’s Law at this point and it’s time to recognize and acknowledge that fact.
  - RangerScience 1y ago
    AFAIK, you cut off shitty relatives… …and you usually find out they’re shitty because of how they handle (or don’t) “political” conversations. Pro tip: You don’t get to decide for someone else what’s “just” politics. If someone else says it’s important, while you’re interacting with them, it’s important.
    - deleted 1y ago
      [deleted]
    - coldtea 1y ago
      >Pro tip: You don’t get to decide for someone else what’s “just” politics. If someone else says it’s important, while you’re interacting with them, it’s important. It's rarely, if ever, important to any concerned party's day to day life. It's bullshit partisanship instilled into idiotic brains by the media and social media. Just because they say it's important, doesn't make it so.
      - RangerScience 1y ago
        Eh. While that might be true in the course of say, governance - where IMO it’s important and worthwhile to use scientific methodology (statistics, etc) to establish “importance” - …your family around the notional holiday dinner table? The personal is what’s important, kinda by definition. The point is the subjective and emotional.
  - spauldo 1y ago
    I've never cut off a relative for their politics, but I've cut off relatives because they wouldn't shut up about their politics. Talk to me about all the gardening you're doing after retirement, about your new motorcycle, about the fishing this year, hell talk to me about your favorite sports team. I'll listen and interact, even if I'm not particularly interested in those things. Tell me for the 500th time about how Biden was a commie and I'll just eat Thanksgiving with my in-laws.
- mkoubaa 1y ago
  What a stupid reason to cut off your child - so late in life too.
  - ChrisMarshallNY 1y ago
    That’s how bad things have gotten, and a lot of it is because it’s profitable to fan the flames of rancor. I don’t see it improving. I think there was a post, a couple of days ago, where some folks concluded that social media is unfixable. “Take off and nuke the entire site from orbit. It’s the only way to be sure.” https://youtu.be/aCbfMkh940Q https://youtu.be/aCbfMkh940Q
dlock17 1y ago
TIL Kendrick Lamar has a HN (/s)

by wincy 1y ago

saghm 1y ago

> I don’t think she even noticed honestly. From her perspective, the post disappeared, and then you never posted anything like that again! Everyone wins

ChrisMarshallNY 1y ago

I had a relative threaten his daughter, because her daughter-in-law posted some political stuff he disagreed with. Basically, he had been helping her out financially, and pulled it, because she refused to sanction her daughter-in-law on his behalf.

coldtea 1y ago
This goes both ways (old to young and reverse), but family goes before politics. You don't cut out, or disown, or stop visiting, or badmouth family because you disagree with their politics... If you do so, you were a shitty relative to begin with.
- generj 1y ago
  It depends, if the political take is sufficiently shitty it’s a betrayal of your morals, friends etc to continue to associate with your family spouting it. Typically that has to be some extreme form of bigotry people won’t let go of after repeated coaching. Extreme bigotry or conspiracy thinking is arguably a form of abuse directed at other family members and it’s 100% ok to cut people off for being abusive.
- Ar-Curunir 1y ago
  Where does it stop? What if your relatives support, eg, racist policies? What if they support genocide? How personal does it have to be? What if you’re dating a person of another race, and your relatives support keeps making racist comments to you, even after you try to explain why that’s not okay?
  - coldtea 1y ago
    >Where does it stop? What if your relatives support, eg, racist policies? What if they support genocide? How personal does it have to be? Unless they act on them, they can support anything they like, it means less than them supporting some team or MCU fandom
    - Ar-Curunir 1y ago
      What? Your relative Being a racist is less important to you than them supporting the opposing team?
      - deleted 1y ago
        [deleted]
- stouset 1y ago
  No, sorry. Nazi family members come last. Family members with no respect for the rights and freedoms of others and who encourage and support inhumane treatment of others don’t get a free pass.
  - coldtea 1y ago
    Unless your family members are card carrying members of the Nazi party, "Nazi" is just a codeword for "disagree with them" just as "no respect for the rights and freedoms of others" is the same.
    - gruturo 1y ago
      That is either a very naive take, or a dishonest one. You don't need an actual nazi party issuing member cards to recognize someone strongly aligned with the values, opinion and realities of the WW2 (and previous decade) nazi party as such. By all means keep trolling or worse if it makes your day, hide behind pedantry if it's any help, but you're fooling very, very few people.
    - stouset 1y ago
      Sorry, but absolutely the fuck not. If someone votes for and cheers on the sending of specific ethnic groups to concentration camps, the removal of rights and freedoms for political opponents, and the advancement of authoritarianism, they are Nazis. We are way beyond Godwin’s Law at this point and it’s time to recognize and acknowledge that fact.
- RangerScience 1y ago
  AFAIK, you cut off shitty relatives… …and you usually find out they’re shitty because of how they handle (or don’t) “political” conversations. Pro tip: You don’t get to decide for someone else what’s “just” politics. If someone else says it’s important, while you’re interacting with them, it’s important.
  - deleted 1y ago
    [deleted]
  - coldtea 1y ago
    >Pro tip: You don’t get to decide for someone else what’s “just” politics. If someone else says it’s important, while you’re interacting with them, it’s important. It's rarely, if ever, important to any concerned party's day to day life. It's bullshit partisanship instilled into idiotic brains by the media and social media. Just because they say it's important, doesn't make it so.
    - RangerScience 1y ago
      Eh. While that might be true in the course of say, governance - where IMO it’s important and worthwhile to use scientific methodology (statistics, etc) to establish “importance” - …your family around the notional holiday dinner table? The personal is what’s important, kinda by definition. The point is the subjective and emotional.
- spauldo 1y ago
  I've never cut off a relative for their politics, but I've cut off relatives because they wouldn't shut up about their politics. Talk to me about all the gardening you're doing after retirement, about your new motorcycle, about the fishing this year, hell talk to me about your favorite sports team. I'll listen and interact, even if I'm not particularly interested in those things. Tell me for the 500th time about how Biden was a commie and I'll just eat Thanksgiving with my in-laws.
mkoubaa 1y ago
What a stupid reason to cut off your child - so late in life too.
- ChrisMarshallNY 1y ago
  That’s how bad things have gotten, and a lot of it is because it’s profitable to fan the flames of rancor. I don’t see it improving. I think there was a post, a couple of days ago, where some folks concluded that social media is unfixable. “Take off and nuke the entire site from orbit. It’s the only way to be sure.” https://youtu.be/aCbfMkh940Q https://youtu.be/aCbfMkh940Q

dlock17 1y ago

TIL Kendrick Lamar has a HN (/s)