3 ms·
It's somewhat ironic, but I frequently see this attitude espoused by programmers or other people who are more on the "clever" side than the "kind" side, and it
by j_baker 14y ago
It's somewhat ironic, but I frequently see this attitude espoused by programmers or other people who are more on the "clever" side than the "kind" side, and it sounds a bit like a "grass is greener on the other side" type of thing. As someone who's good at being kind, let me say that it's not always what it's cracked up to be. Kindness can not only win you friends and allies, but it can also turn you into a giant doormat. What's most important is knowing when to be kind and when to be clever. Sometimes being unlikable and unkind but smart is the right solution.
- minikites 14y agoMaybe I'm just really oblivious or quite lucky personally, but I feel like people who are hyper-concerned about being taken advantage of make themselves way more miserable than if they just relaxed and stopped worrying about other people. If you act out of fear that people are talking about you or taking advantage of you, you are likely to make that happen.
- majelix 14y agoIt's because it's something we suck at and so have to consciously work on. I imagine that there's an extrovert party going on somewhere where they're all talking up how important being right actually is.
- lilsunnybee 14y agoKind is not being a doormat; kind is doing what will benefit everyone in the long run. Letting yourself be taken advantage of is cruel to yourself, and of questionable long-term value to anyone who would see fit to take advantage of someone else. The kindest thing to do is offer help when it appears to be most valuable, taking your own well-being into account as well as that of others.