We don't let anyone find you on the site without your short secret code which they need to ask you for. The code can be changed anytime. You (the user) need to

We don't let anyone find you on the site without your short secret code which they need to ask you for. The code can be changed anytime. You (the user) need to actively ask your friends' code to build up the network. This also keeps the network small since you won't go out of your way to ask someone their code unless you really know them. A really private place with only people that matter.