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Men, Where Have You Gone? Please Come Back

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• prmph 1y ago
  Archive link: https://web.archive.org/web/20250620061054/https://www.nytimes.com/2025/06/20/style/modern-love-men-where-have-you-gone-please-come-back.html https://web.archive.org/web/20250620061054/https://www.nytim...
• bell-cot 1y ago
  7 points and 10 comments (mostly off-subject) yesterday: https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=44329057 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=44329057
  • prmph 1y ago
    Right, so we can have a proper discussion this time
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• WarOnPrivacy 1y ago
  I live with my adult sons. None of us are dating; it's not on the horizon. For my sons, here are the reasons I see. Financial. A 4 income economy makes pairing off impossible. Familyhood is ruined: Parenting time is up 20 fold from 1950s because kids req 24/7 adulting. Stress++ Joy-- Children lost free range area and fully live in adult curated, adult populated boxes. S++ J-- cont. Trespassing & crime cultures severely limit risk taking. Bureaucratic obedience++ Ambition-- cont. Dearth of adult-free peer time denies interpersonal relationship skill development. Connection-- cont. Growing up in the childhood apocalypse discourages making more children. A 4 income economy is even harder on families than it is on couples. Speaking broadly, growing up in a post-childhood world shaped the men in the article. The qualities that the author mourns as absent, intimacy — slowness, curiosity, accountability, they sound a whole lot like the qualities that once developed in the childhood environments we've erased. And for the qualities she sees emerging Avoidance. Exhaustion. Disrepair., they seem like predictable products of an increasingly punitive society and an over-burdensome economy.