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I once wrote a personal’s ad in SQL on Craigslist, back when they had that section. A DBA replied and asked if I wanted hawking. She had a Cooper’s hawk. I m
by devoutsalsa 1y ago
I once wrote a personal’s ad in SQL on Craigslist, back when they had that section. A DBA replied and asked if I wanted hawking. She had a Cooper’s hawk. I met her at a commercial park in a Saturday morning. She was driving a Honda CRV, the hawk was in the front passenger seat, and I hopped into the back seat.
She started driving and spotted some crows. The hawk saw them as well. Wearing a “don’t kill me either your claws” glove, she moved her hand to the hawk, who gleefully jumped on. She rolled down her window, stuck the hawk outside, and it was basically a drive by shooting with a bird bullet. This happened three times.
My most vivid memory of this was her ripping the crows apart into pieces and putting the then into a bucket, like it was sushi you’d order from KFC.
- deleted 1y ago[deleted]
- dmd 1y agoAnd you didn't get married!?
- throwanem 1y agoNot OP, but I'm friends with crows. Imagine having to try to explain that...
- srean 1y agoVery intelligent birds.
- IAmBroom 1y ago"Baby, those body parts mean nothing to me! I love crows!" Don't hate the player, baby.
- throwanem 1y agoThey have a much stronger sense of propriety than most humans. So really do most animals other than us and perhaps some close relatives. I'm not actually sure that says anything in our favor.
- qingcharles 1y agoThis is peak HN.
- senkora 1y agoI bet she was a very good database administrator.
- layer8 1y agoProbably the hawkish type.
- 3cats-in-a-coat 1y agoAnd this, kids, is a Markov chain.
- kstrauser 1y agoI know this person IRL, and I'm certain it's not.
- 3cats-in-a-coat 1y agoProve it with SQL.
- kstrauser 1y agoDO $$ BEGIN ASSERT ( SELECT COUNT(1) FROM friends JOIN posters ON friends.id = posters.id WHERE posters.username = 'devoutsalsa' ) = 1, 'He''s in there, I swear it!'; END; $$;
- cs02rm0 1y agoI once wrote a personal’s ad in SQL on Craigslist, back when they had that section. A DBA replied and asked if I wanted hawking. I feel I have to reply, but I have no idea what to say.
- deadbabe 1y agoFor starters he could post what the hell his SQL query was.
- tsss 1y agoThat's really horrible. Crows can feel pain too, you know.
- patrick41638265 1y agoReading the first paragraph of this made me think how LLMs must feel when someone tries prompt injection on them
- speakfreely 1y agoI've reread this a few times and I still can't figure out if there's something wrong with me or something wrong with this post.
- cryptonector 1y agohttps://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=44109901 https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=44109901
- isatty 1y agoWhatever this is, write more.
- deleted 1y ago[deleted]
- MarceliusK 1y agoThis is one of those stories that just keeps escalating into "am I in a dream or a side quest?" territory... Also, "sushi you’d order from KFC" is going to haunt me
- JSR_FDED 1y agoI feel like I’ve just taken someone else’s medicine.
- _pktm_ 1y agoI would dearly love to see that ad; any chance you still have it or could more or less reconstruct it?
- devoutsalsa 1y agoI was looking for it in my email, but I think it's long gone.
- _pktm_ 1y agoThanks for looking! It just sounded like the kind of clever I love.