I have no idea how your bringing XMPP into this but just as Node, AMQP, ActiveMQ, ZeroMQ, Jetty, or <insert messaging or async tool here> they have have no sing

I have no idea how your bringing XMPP into this but just as Node, AMQP, ActiveMQ, ZeroMQ, Jetty, or <insert messaging or async tool here> they have have no singular impact on a system being realtime or not, they are just tools. If you want to consider a system which involves these tools and has a realtime constraint e.g. X arrives before Y time or we're seriously screwed, then sure, I'll happily concede and call the system, not the tool, realtime.