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Show HN: Chapter 1 of a Sci-Fi Novel I am writing
- jewbacca 14y agoI feel like this is sw007, just baiting us.
- geon 14y agoI feel like there could be a really interesting story behind this. You mention interesting concepts like interplanetary colonization, destruction of the Earth ecology, fascist government and extreme reduction in population. But the languag is difficult to read. There are lots of missing commas and bad grammar, making it difficult to parse some of the sentences. I get the feeling you are not writing idiomatic english, but translate more or less word-by-word from another language. I suppose writing skills comes from practice, so don't give up. Write down your story and go back to refine the language later.
- zitterbewegung 14y agoWell, this is pretty preliminary. I will make the commas and grammar corrections. Thanks for the input.
- davewasthere 14y agoMusings of an artist trying to to computer science? I think you accidentally a word.
- Udo 14y agoI've subscribed to the feed, curious how it will develop. I believe there are two things that could be improved. First, spelling and grammar. I know it's superficial, but as a reader I always get the feeling an author doesn't value my time when they don't proof read their stuff. The other thing that bothered me is the usage of cultural references, in this case Star Trek. It's a little patronizing to the reader and it's also superfluous to describe the renderer in this way. Just tell us what it does. You might even be better off leaving out certain specifics in science fiction, your stories will have a much longer shelf life that way. That being said: keep on writing!
- zitterbewegung 14y agoI took your suggestions and fixed those points.