Sounds like a quote from pTerry's Guards! Guards! Sergeant Colon adjusted his armor haughtily. “When you really need them the most,” he said, “million-to-one

Sounds like a quote from pTerry's Guards! Guards! Sergeant Colon adjusted his armor haughtily. “When you really need them the most,” he said, “million-to-one chances always crop up. Well-known fact.”