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As an employee with ADHD, I found this rather unhelpful. Some of us do have to work for a living, and getting fired can have very serious consequences on our li
by entropi 1y ago
As an employee with ADHD, I found this rather unhelpful. Some of us do have to work for a living, and getting fired can have very serious consequences on our lives.
For a lot of us, avoiding (or increasing the likelihood of avoiding) being perceived by our employers as "lazy, careless, unreliable, or defensive" is often worth the exhaustion of trying.
- lawlessone 1y agoyeah >Regularly ask yourself: "Will worrying about this job matter two years from now?" This is particular. I've never had a job that didn't matter to me.. why would i work if i did not have to?
- gibagger 1y agoAs a fellow ADHD-having person, I get you. After some point, after dealing with multiple burnouts, you learn to detach your self worth from your job and try to seek other sources of fulfillment and satisfaction. It took a while to get there, but I finally did. That doesn't make your job and your income any less important for other aspects of your life. My immigration status relied for almost 7 years on my employment. You can imagine how worried I was by the prospect of losing my job.
- entropi 1y agoI am also an immigrant, and my residency status has just recently decoupled from my employment status. I can imagine, and am happy for you too :). Thankfully, I never experienced proper burnouts; but I did experience multiple cycles of being really invested in my job and just barely pushing myself to pay the bills. I do think with time, and by experiencing more cycles, I am getting closer to striking a healthier balance.
- bionade24 1y agoI think you misinterpret the message of the article. I think the message is analogous to "don't feel guilty if you failed to obey the norms of behaviour", which does not mean at all that you should aim to break those norms and behave uncordial and inappropriate on purpose. You absolutely have to try your best, even for your own good. But for your own good, you have to have patience and empathy with yourself, too. On another note, your perspective of trying to avoid being unemployed 3-12 months during job seeking is a rather US-American centered perspective. I get that HN is from the USA, but this view doesn't apply to every other region of the world.
- entropi 1y agoI get that having empathy with yourself and not hating yourself in case you have to face consequences of having ADHD is very important and good. But I would argue that not fearing the said consequences is a very different thing; and likely not even productive/feasible for a lot of people. I got the impression that the author is advising for the latter too; considering the title and statements like >You probably won't change their perceptions, so don't exhaust yourself trying to prove otherwise.
- conorjh 1y agoDo you mean you actually work hard or just avoid getting caught being lazy? If you can work hard, I dont think you had an inability to do it in the first place
- entropi 1y agoIt is not a binary choice between these two. If you have ADHD, and you need to work for a living; in time, you come up with personal strategies. I found that I am able to focus on things better when I am under a lot of stress or pressure. So I actively try to put myself into these kind of situations. Or, I found that simply sitting down, removing all possible distractions, and consistently forcing myself to do a thing does work; although with severely reduced efficiency i.e. sit down 4 hours, get 1 hour of work done with ~20 internal interruptions. But it does get done. These are rather exhausting things to be doing all the time. So you always work hard at working. But you don't get consistent results. If you work harder at working, you get less inconsistent results. My point was that its often worth it.