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Wow, this sounds soo familiar. I remember having similar thoughts when I was in high school. I'll try to give some useful advice. I have no social group of my
by jmatt 18y ago
Wow, this sounds soo familiar. I remember having similar thoughts when I was in high school. I'll try to give some useful advice.
I have no social group of my own and go back and forth between their friend circles.
I'd ignore social groups entirely. Seriously, just forget any of these artificial groups of friends. I know that's not actually possible but in general don't worry about it. When I look back at the stratification of my high school social order it seems like it was straight out of "lord of the flies". Interact with the people who are doing interesting things. People who you find interesting or enjoy spending time with. Don't join any friend groups, that's an entirely isolating situation. Right now you can freely "group" with whoever you want.
Everyone has told me to wait until college, and then I will find new people, but everyone I know in college generally sticks with the same friend group that they had in high school (hence why I would know), so I don't have much hope in that.
Don't go to college where everyone else is going to college. Get away from all this. I did, and it was one of the best decisions I made when I was a teenager. Everyone in high school will likely think you are crazy for not going to the usual schools, but who cares.
I think the single best thing you can do is just get out and... do things. This is surprisingly simple but will really make a difference. I think it's been echoed here already by a number of other people. Pickup a new sport, go see a movie, go to clubs, take classes at the community college, go on a road trip (gas is affordable again!), see a concert you would otherwise not see, play cards, go to a house party, study with people you usually wouldn't study with, volunteer somewhere, go to a museum, get an unusual part-time job, do something that no one else is doing. Go buy a copy of Make magazine and pick a project (http://www.makezine.com/ http://www.makezine.com/). Before you know it, you'll be the interesting person that other people will want to spend time with.
And of course read PG's take on high school and nerds: http://www.paulgraham.com/nerds.html http://www.paulgraham.com/nerds.html Somehow this hasn't been linked to in the post. I know it represents my high school experiences very well and he gives great advice.
- mnemonik 18y agoGood call on Make Magazine! I suggest that daniel_ start a project that he will probably need help with, and meet new people through the project. Tons of fun to be had from that magazine, I wish I had time to pursue all the DIY projects I could, oh well.