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Anecdata: I can count only a few couples in my circle of friends - who mostly had kids in their late 30s and early 40s - who didn’t end up having long and somet
by danw1979 2y ago
Anecdata: I can count only a few couples in my circle of friends - who mostly had kids in their late 30s and early 40s - who didn’t end up having long and sometimes heartbreaking IVF, copious miscarriages, kids with trisomy, and in our case, stillbirth.
I think part of the problem was an assumption that modern medicine around childbirth is actually better than it is, and thus delaying having kids is a safe choice.
I consider myself very lucky indeed to have two healthy sons and my advice to my eldest is to get on with having kids as soon as you’ve met the right person, ideally in your 20s…
- Qem 2y agoI suspect part of the problem is that many people think fertility is like a step function with a sharp transition by menopause age (~45 years), when it steadily decreases since much earlier, in your 30s. Biology books in school should have a nice graph showing this clearly.
- smackeyacky 2y agoOur experience was that conceiving before 30 was much easier than even early thirties. Watching our friends and colleagues struggling as you said with AI and fertility treatments was a real eye opener. I certainly don’t want to pressure my kids but they definitely should be more aware than they are.