4 ms·

I used to live in a suburb. I met people the same way you meet people anywhere: common interests. A dozen or so people with dogs met at the park every day. We

I used to live in a suburb. I met people the same way you meet people anywhere: common interests. A dozen or so people with dogs met at the park every day. We knew each other, watched each other's houses/pets on vacation, and sometimes did dinner or BBQs. A few people organized a DnD group after advertising on nextdoor (which is a cesspool but only 70%). Of course those with kids the same age often knew each other because of school or activities. The neighborhood park had a system of "pea patches" where you could grow some stuff next to your neighbors. There's nothing that unique all in all about this space other than there was a "third place" we all had built and took care of (the park was originally supposed to be a school that never got built so the community got it to become a park but at least half the work came from the community. The county provided some matching work). The weird thing is people are people no matter where they are, mostly. And if you are lonely, you can go fix it. Lots of people move from somewhere they hate so somewhere they think will solve all their problems. And they are right. Or they move from somewhere they love to somewhere that they know will be terrible. And they are right. It seems like whether you think your neighborhood is great or terrible, you're not right.

ryandrake 2y ago
My suburban neighborhood is great. They have a voluntary group that you can join with a donation, and all that group really does is organize parties and events. It's not a HOA and doesn't have rules. We have a full community get-together event every two months or so, with volunteers who host at their houses. We also have once-a-year events like a community-wide garage sale event, and a car show. I've also lived in neighborhoods where nobody knew each other. I think all we can get out of this HN thread is: "Not all suburban neighborhoods are the same."
- gobeavs 2y ago
  Out of curiosity, did you know the neighborhood was like that before moving in? Or was it luck? I agree there's a huge variety in neighborhoods in the suburban umbrella, which is unfortunately ignored in urban/suburb discussions. We're house shopping and want to find a "good" neighborhood, but short of knowing someone in the neighborhood already or spending significant time in the neighborhood it's hard to get a good indication of vibes.

ryandrake 2y ago

My suburban neighborhood is great. They have a voluntary group that you can join with a donation, and all that group really does is organize parties and events. It's not a HOA and doesn't have rules. We have a full community get-together event every two months or so, with volunteers who host at their houses. We also have once-a-year events like a community-wide garage sale event, and a car show. I've also lived in neighborhoods where nobody knew each other. I think all we can get out of this HN thread is: "Not all suburban neighborhoods are the same."

gobeavs 2y ago
Out of curiosity, did you know the neighborhood was like that before moving in? Or was it luck? I agree there's a huge variety in neighborhoods in the suburban umbrella, which is unfortunately ignored in urban/suburb discussions. We're house shopping and want to find a "good" neighborhood, but short of knowing someone in the neighborhood already or spending significant time in the neighborhood it's hard to get a good indication of vibes.