The problem is that in most engineering discussions "big tech does this" is instant discussion win, while a solution that deviates from what coworkers perceive

The problem is that in most engineering discussions "big tech does this" is instant discussion win, while a solution that deviates from what coworkers perceive as "standard" will never get accepted, even if you use logical arguments. I mean, if I'm doing a project with one other person, we can use logic to get to the best solution, but if it's three people in a group or more, then the most charismatic person becomes the leader, and the rest does whatever the leader wants, even if they make bad calls.